He straightens, and the loss of his fingers and the warmth of his mouth are almost more than I can bear. A second later, though, I feel him palm his cock and he guides himself back to my entrance. He runs his cock through my swollen folds and I grind back into him, helpless to stop myself, completely out of control.
“Want to feel you,” he groans. “Want to go in bare. Never. I’ve never not wrapped up before, Ami. You got that?”
“Yes…” My voice is strained and tiny past my tightened up throat. I want him. I want him like that so badly that it nearly kills me. “I- I’m not on the pill, Gage. I’m not on anything. So if you… you’ll have to pull out.”
“That’s playing with fire, Ami.”
“Then get a condom,” I nearly snap, the desire to have him inside me, stretching and filling me, pumping into me, and claiming me, making me stupid with need.
“You’ll have to wait for that, darlin’. I’d have to go to the store and it just happens to be pouring rain. Someone recently told me that I’m crazy to go riding in it, so you might have to waithours.”
My hips slam back, nearly forcing his cock inside of me. I rub against him greedily, like an animal. “Gage!” I don’t evenhate that I’ve pretty much been reduced to begging. “Please. Please just…”
“Just what?”
“Just… just be careful. I want to feel you too. No barriers. But…”
“I’ll be careful.” His voice wraps around me like I’m glass and he promises not to shatter me.
I realize that it’s stupid. That it’s careless. That it’s so far from being responsible, but I want him too damn badly to stop. To listen to reason. I know there are other options. Safety nets. I can go to the clinic after I leave his house…
I don’t want to think about that though, about the later, about the aftermath, about the fallout. I just want this. I want this, now. I want to just live in this moment. Just him and me, like he said. Nothing else. Just us. Consenting adults who want each other. Who need each other. I want to get lost in him and shelter him. I want to give him my pain and lap his away like the ocean licking at the sand, creating something new.
“Alright,” I breathe, and that’s it.
Because when he plunges inside of me, filling me with a single, hard stroke, straight to the hilt, joining us, our bodies, our hearts, our souls, I know I’m lost.
Chapter 22
Gage
It occurs to me, when I’m close, so fucking close to slamming home, my weeping cockhead covered in Ami’s sweet cream from her soaked slit, that something has already changed.
I’m one hell of a naïve bastard, because I knew that I wanted her from the second I saw her, walking down that aisle at our sham of a wedding, but I didn’t realize that I needed her.
Maybe it’s because I’ve spent my whole life without someone there to love me properly. Or someone to love in return. I have my club brothers now, but that’s not the same kind of love. I don’t want to say I’m desperate. Because I’m not. If she asked me for time, I’d give her all the time in the world, just as long as she promised to be mine at the end of it. I’d give her anything she asked for. I’d even sign those damn papers, if she needed me to. I’d give her another year, happily, if she’d tell me that she was mine and she needed that shit to find herself, or whatever people said nowadays when they were confused and fucked up and needed a shred of inner peace.
As long as she’s mine at the end of it, I’m game.
I realize, as I thrust into her, as stars burst behind my closed eyes at her snug cunt closing all around my dick, pulsing and contracting before I even move, that I’m a thousand versions of pathetic. The problem is that I can’t bring myself to care.
Because she’s right.
As much as she’s mine, I’m equally hers.
I know it’s been no time at all. That we may have known each other for a year and it’s been a fraction of that time since she literally strolled right back into town, but beginnings are beginnings and a lifetime is a lifetime and that shit has to start at day one. Our day one is already over and done. We’re moving at the speed of fucking light, but we have a hell of a lot of lost time to make up for.
“God… oh my god,” Ami pants, and I snap out of my thoughts, and what the hell am I doing thinking anyway, when I’m inside of her tight, hot heat and she’s clenching all around me, tight and fucking wondrous.
“Want you to say my name,” I growl.
My hands close around her hips, bracing her as I pull nearly all the way out and slam back home. I’m not gentle. I don’t know how to be gentle. If she asked me to, though, I’d figure it out real fucking fast, but my girl doesn’t ask for sweetness or flowers or poetry. She wants me as hard and fast and as maddening as I want her.
“Want you to look between your legs and watch me fucking you. Watch my cock glisten with your juices when I pull out. Watch you take every single inch of me when I thrust back in. I want you to watch… so you know who’s fucking you, because I sure as hell am a lot of things, but I’m not god.”
“You’re an asshole,” she grinds out, but her neck snaps down and she whimpers when I pulse inside of her before pulling out nice and slow and sinking in just as slow, treating her to a real show.
Since her entire body rattles around me and her cunt squeezes tight, I do it again. One more time and a volley of goosebumps dot her skin, raising the hair on her arms, which are straining to hold herself upright on the bed. Her legs start trembling, her knees knocking against the edge of the bed, even when I hold her hips snug against me.
