I know the name might come as a shock to you. I chose it on purpose.
She has your mother’s eyes. I noticed that the first time she looked up at me like she already understood more than she should. I can’t help but wonder if that means she’d grow up feeling everything as deeply as your mother did. The same way you do.
She is gentle in a way the world doesn’t deserve, and stubborn in a way that can only resemble her father.
You can give her the life we always dreamed about; safety, stability, and a future that won’t be constantly slipping through her fingers.
I can’t.
This is the last thing I ever wanted to do.
She doesn’t know who you are and I am asking you, selfishly, not to tell her. Not yet.
She will already grow up knowing I left her. She doesn’t need to grow up knowing you chose to.
That’s why, when she is old enough to understand that none of this was her fault, there is a letter in here for her.
Take care of her.
Love her enough that she will never question where she belongs.
Even if I am the reason, she will.
Liz
My knees threatento buckle when I realize what I’m holding in my hands. It all starts to make sense.
Payson Elizabeth Reith.
Named after my mother. My name is printed on the line just below Payson’s. Seeing it there hits me like a hammer straight to my chest. I never knew Liz was pregnant. I’m not sure what the outcome would have been at the time if I did. Liz hated me. She couldn’t stand to even look at me for what I had done and reading it in her letter only clarifies it.
I hear Payson’s soft voice drifting from inside the house, making this ache in my chest grow deeper. I’m not sure how I am supposed to protect my own daughter from the pain this is about to cause.What have I done?
CHAPTER 1
PRESENT DAY- AGE 20
Payson
Beinga part of one of the wealthiest and most powerful families in Louisiana meant that growing up, I had a certain reputation I was expected to uphold. There are specific groups I am not to be caught socializing with, even while in college, and ones I am only permitted to be seen with. My personal life must be kept as private as possible. I knew once people heard I was adopted, rumors would start to circulate out of control. It became worse than I thought. The weight of my last name was and is unbearable. I wanted nothing more than to escape it, and I tried. College was my outlet, and I was determined to live my life the way I intended and not how I was being told to.
When I met Kraig, his charming, laid-back attitude drew me in. He was kind and respectful, and he had the same goals for his life as I did. The only difference was that he was studying to be a lawyer, and I was studying interior design. Once we became an item, we were inseparable. There wasn’t a social event on campus that we weren’t at together. The best part was that everyone knew who I was, and they didn’t care. After everythingI have been through, I wanted nothing more than to experience everything I missed out on, and I wanted to experience it with him. And I did. But when college was over things began to shift. I wanted us to move into our own apartment so we could have our own space—a place with no roommates, no curfews, and no cameras. Just because no one cared who I was on campus never meant they never tried to capture photos of me in my birthday suit to sell for a few bucks. I was then, and still am now, a Reith. At first, learning to live together was a bit rough. Some days were great, others not so much. The way he would leave the toilet seat up every time he used the toilet grinded my nerves. Or the way he couldn’t stand that I slept with so many pillows on my bed. Why that bothered him, I don’t know.
Around our one-year anniversary, we went to a birthday celebration for a friend of Kraig’s. We danced, we ate, we drank, we danced some more. When we were being too ‘clingy’ as Kraig called it, we would chat with our friends. It was when I was returning from walking to the bathroom with Ashton that I overheard him say, “My fiancée and I.”
It took a long minute for me to process what I heard. I’m not sure if it sort of slipped out or if it was all for show. From then on, we were engaged. It was strange to say I was his fiancée when he never officially proposed. Like one night I asked him about a ring. The next thing I know, a box was tossed to me as I sat on the couch watching some singing competition show. He only said, “There's your ring.” It should’ve offended me. I should’ve thrown it back at him and demanded a proper proposal, but I was so caught up in the idea of being engaged that I didn’t care.
That was up until a few months ago, when I started to notice him becoming more closed off than before. He’s been working a lot more than he has the entire time we have been together. It bothers me more than I care to admit. Even more so now that the business trips have become more frequent.
CHAPTER 2
Payson
The early morningsun beams through the sheer curtains I have hanging over my balcony doors, forcing me awake. It is my day off, and I usually remember to pull my blackout curtains before bed, too. But after a few drinks last night, that was the furthest thing from my mind.
I reach over to where Kraig’s side of the bed is, but he’s already gone. A note crinkles under my hand as I sit up and begin reading it. At least he left a note this time. Apparently, he had to leave on yet another business trip this morning and didn’t want to wake me. This would be trip number three for November. It seems lately he is always off on some business trip more than he is at home with me.
My phone pings loudly with a text from atop the nightstand, startling me. As my eyes adjust to the brightness of the room, I notice it’s a group chat from my best friends. As I click the message, balloons fill my screen.
