I couldn’t leave her.
Not now. Notever.
Balling up every emotion, I promised myself that she wouldn’t have to worry. No matter what happened after I told her, no matter what it took, I would find this person and kill them for violating her.
Knox had said that he had never “fully” violated her, but these things were equally unforgivable. I just hoped she would understand why I kept it from her for so long. I paced the room, trying to convince myself that everything would be fine, but the videos played repeatedly in my head. As much as I fought them, the images began to sear themselves into my brain. A type of pain washed over me that I had never felt before—one I couldn’t identify. I knew that even this was nowhere close to what she would feel when she found out.
Through the entirety of my mental breakdown, Ember didn’t stir. She just laid there, completely unaware of the crumbling walls around us. Blind to the fact that someone was touching her while she slept,because she still had no idea.
I couldn’t help the avalanche that was occurring in my head. Truthfully, I knew that when it came to this situation, my feelings and thoughts were irrelevant. Nothing about me mattered becausethis, this was going to destroy her, and I could do nothing but let it.
The mattress dipped under my weight as I settled back next to her, scared to touch her. “How come you never woke up, baby,” I whispered under my breath as my hand slid into her hair, pushing it gently off her forehead.
I just sat and stared at her, fighting against everything that twisted in my chest. Using my thumb, I brushed over her temple until I had slightly calmed. Bythen, I’d convinced myself that I needed to tell her as soon as I got the name from Knox.
30
Ember
The smell pulled me from a dream I didn’t want to leave.
Warm waves of salty cheese permeated my senses. The image surrounding me rippled away, rushing me back into reality. My eyes fluttered open as my lashes stuck together, but soon, the room came into focus. The ceiling, the bed, and Silas, with a plastic container between us.
Propped up on one elbow, he was lying on his side next to me. His expression was cautious but focused. It seemed as if he was watching me like he’d been there for a while. A small smile curved his mouth when he realized I was awake, but something was off about him. He pushed the large bowl toward me and handed me a fork. “I’m not sure if you just talk in your sleep or if you were actually asking me for food, but I got some anyway.”
My stomach answered him before I did, growling loudly between us. I’d definitely asked for food on purpose, considering how this man was making a habit out of depleting my energy. Taking the fork from him, I stretched my arms, reaching over my head until my back popped. “Well, I have been quite busy.”
Silas huffed quietly, almost amused. Then he shifted, reaching over to a side table that wasn’t there before. Grabbing twocold water bottles, he turned back to me. “Plan on beingbusyfor most of your life now.” His smile grew wider as he handed me one. “Drink.”
My throat felt like I swallowed sand, which made sense—considering how many times I’d screamed out his name. Naturally, I wanted to fight him and his damn instruction, but I twisted the cap off and chugged half of it immediately. As I pulled the bottle away from my mouth, I noticed the food between us.
My eyes widened as my mouth began to water. “Oh my god.” I ripped the bowl into my lap like he might take it away from me, as drool continued to form.Fries. Not just regular fries, but multiple stacks drowned in thick country gravy. I couldn’t help the smile that took over my face, and suddenly, I felt like a child who’d just received an ice cream cone. “Silas.” His name came out as a sigh before I shoved the first bite into my mouth and groaned with instant approval. Every bite was a continuous flood of hot, crispy perfection. “Is it weird if I say I forgive you? Foreverything?”
Instead of answering, he looked down, leaning back against the headboard beside me. “Don’t say that just yet,” he muttered to himself. I barely caught it but paid it no mind because for the next few minutes, I was solely lost in fries. He just sat there and watched me devour them with his arms resting loosely over his knees. It wasn't long before I'd finished the entire container. I had just wiped my mouth when he spoke.
“Can I ask you something?”
Completely content, I snuggled into the blanket and shrugged. “Go for it.”
“Your friends,” he said, bringing his eyes up to me. “The ones you live with. Tell me about them?”
I gave a shallow nod and closed my eyes as I started talking. “Kinsley is easy, I guess. I mean, we get along well. She’s always been everything I’m not, because life has always come easy for her.” I snorted, opening one eye at him. “Which has always been slightly annoying.”
Silas’s eyes slightly narrowed at that comment, like he was cataloging everything I said.
“She’s funny and doesn’t take no for an answer, been that way for as long as I’ve known her, but sometimes, it’s like we live in two different worlds,” I added.
He nodded slowly before moving to the foot of the bed and taking my leg into his hands. Focusing along the muscle there, he massaged my calf.
“And Bodhi is her other half, basically my brother. He’s a quarterback and stays with us when he can. Sometimes it’s weekends, sometimes just the summer. He’s basically like, the house dad when he’s there, making sure everyone is taken care of.”
Silas’s jaw tightened slightly at that, but his hands kept moving.
“Kolby is Kinsley's brother,” I opened my eyes, feeling myself smile, “They’re fraternal twins but honestly, they couldn’t be more opposite from each other. I’m surprised he’s survived thislong with how he acts sometimes. Between his impulses and that mouth of his, he tends to get in trouble a lot.” Dropping the blanket, I dramatically brought my hands up to my throat. “Kinsley choked him multiple times. Like,physically, with her bare hands.”
The memory of that night played out in my head as I mentally watched Kolby get tackled by Kinsley in front of me, for just merely existing. I laughed involuntarily at the image.
Silas’s hands stopped moving. “His mouth, huh?”
