This demand has him lifting his head, his face a picture of concern that I’m not enjoying it. However, after a brief smile to assuage his concerns, I add, “It’s wonderful, but I want you deep inside me when I come.”
I’m not used to asking for what I want like this, especially not in the bedroom. But I’ve wanted nothing as much as I want Tyler filling me when my body shatters.
“As you wish.”
He doesn’t hurry though, working his way back up my body in a way that keeps me just on the edge, just hanging on by a thread.
Him sliding into me is as poetry, so easily is it achieved. We truly fit together like two halves of a puzzle. And then he moves and all thoughts of puzzles flee.
Now all I can think about is how he stretches me, my body aware of every silken inch of him as he fills me over and over.
And yet I want to be closer still, something that has me wrapping my legs around behind him. I want him filling me completely.
Only when he speaks do I find out what’s been missing.
“Damn it, Lily. I love you. I love you so much.”
His words, interspersed with that slow in and out he has down to a fine art, are enough to have me over the edge. I don’t go quietly though.
“Tyler, I love you, too. I love you so much, it hurts.”
Everything else I’ve got to say after this is incoherent as the enormity of my declaration thrums through me. It’s as if declaring my true feelings for this wonderful man has made our love-making even more impactful, but it has.
And yet, as Tyler finally succumbs to his own release, I’ve never felt so vulnerable in all my life. Not even when I was breaking the news to Mitchell that I’d never be able to have children.
He hadn’t taken the news well, declaring our five-year marriage a complete waste of his time. His rejection, coming as it had when I was still in the hospital following laparoscopy to remove yet more scar tissue, had been devastating.
I suspect it was also the moment he’d started planning to replace me.
Perhaps it’s this that has me unable to believe that Tyler, and especially Zoe, will take me on, even knowing of my shortcomings.
As if sensing my worries, on lying beside me, Tyler places a reverent kiss on my forehead, and then my lips, before holding me tight.
With my head pressed against his solid chest, there’s no missing that his heartbeat is even faster than mine. By the time sleep claims us, our hearts are perfectly in sync.
TYLER
On waking the following morning, I take a second to work out where I am. Then, the only thing in no doubt is that I love the woman snuggling up to me more than life itself. Even better is that I know she feels the same way.
So why then do I feel like the other shoe is about to drop?
I know Lily has reservations, but they’re nothing we can’t face together. I’d told her this after we’d made love a second time in the middle of the night. Yes, adoption can be difficult, but it’s not impossible.
There were also a lot of kids in the foster system who were crying out for a wonderful home, if only for a temporary respite. So long had we talked of the pros and cons that it was close to four o’clock before we fell asleep again.
I’ve come to no conclusions as to my anxiety when there’s a loud pounding on the door of the trailer. Ethan follows this up by bellowing my name.
Ah, that’ll be it. Next to me, Lily struggles to rouse herself.
“Tyler Vance, you get your sorry ass out here. Now!”
While my boss wants me out there pronto, there isn’t a chance I’m facing him naked. Not if there’s any hope of saving my job. I’ve no sooner thought this than I realize that where Lily is concerned, it’s a sacrifice I’m prepared to make.
Sick of scurrying around, keeping our relationship quiet, I want to show the woman I love off to the world, to my family and friends. There isn’t a chance I want anyone thinking I’m ashamed of her.
“Hold your horses. I’ll be out in a second.”
Much as I get along well with my boss, I’ve no plans to push it by opening that door only wearing a smile. Not with my potentially buying a solitaire soon. And definitely not with Zoe having just started school.
