“Someone accused his son of killing another child. I would’ve punched the guy, too.”
The men who’d kidnapped Ethan and his friend Tomas had sexually assaulted and murdered a thirteen-year-old girl named Luna, who’d been friends with the boys. Ethan and Tomas hadn’t seen Luna during their captivity and were devastated by her death. The innuendo floating around online that the boys had been involved in her murder had made a bad situation a thousand times worse.
“I suppose I would’ve punched him, too,” Sam said.
“You were so upset about it that I didn’t want to ask how much trouble Mike might be in.”
“He’ll be charged with misdemeanor assault at his court appearance on Monday, but it may be tossed when the judge hears the circumstances.”
“Let’s hope so. What did Tracy say about it?”
“She felt terrible that someone said that to him. She was going to text him to check in.”
“It’s good news that they’re talking.”
“Yeah, I guess.” Real trouble between Tracy and Mike, who’d been in Sam’s life since she was in high school, was unfathomable.
He covered her cold hand with his much warmer one. “Maybe your anxiety is due to the rift between them. He’s been a very big part of your life for all the most important years. Of course trouble between them would rock you.”
“They’re my gold standard, you know?”
“I get that. One thing I’m sure of is that they love each other very much, and while this is a difficult, upsetting situation, I have to believe they’ll find their way back to each other.”
“What if they don’t?”
“Let’s cross that bridge if or when we come to it. There’s no sense making yourself sick over something you have no control over.” He dropped a kiss on the top of her head. “Your family has been through hell in the last six months. No one would blame you for being traumatized by it all.”
“Sometimes I think it’s all my fault.”
“What? How in the world did you come to that conclusion?”
“My high-profile life has put the people I love in danger.”
“You had nothing to do with Brooke being attacked at a party or your dad’s shooting and subsequent death or Spencer overdosing on bad pills or Ethan being kidnapped by people who had no idea who he was to you.”
“When you put it like that…”
“While these things are deeply personal to you, none of them was caused by you or our high profile.”
Sam wallowed in his familiar scent and the sound of his voice, which was incredibly comforting. “Dr. Trulo says that blaming myself for things outside of my control is a response to trauma.”
“Which makes a lot of sense. Christina said something to me the other day that really resonated.” His press secretary was married to Sam’s sergeant, Tommy Gonzales. “She was talking about when Tommy found out he had a son and how deeply that affected their early relationship. She said after going through that experience, she has no idea how you and I stay sane with everything that happens in our lives on a weekly basis.”
“It’s been a lot.”
“You need a break. A real break, not just a day or two to regroup, but a few weeks or a month or whatever it takes to heal from the trauma.”
“I wish I had the luxury of taking that kind of time, but there’s always another case coming at me, people who need me, a team to lead.”
“We need you. Your family needs you. If you’re burnt out or suffering from PTSD or not taking care of yourself, you can’t take care of anyone else.”
“I hear you, and I don’t disagree.” Taking weeks or a month away from work seemed impossibly daunting to her, even if she had the time on the books. Part of her feared if she stepped away, even for a short time, she might never return to the job that had defined her adult life. She couldn’t express that fear out loud, even to him, because that would make it real.
“Do you think you could get some sleep now?” he asked.
“I suppose I can try.”
“We’ll talk more about this in the morning.”
