Two minutes. That’s how long I’ve been listening to Harper cry her eyes out behind me on the ride back to the barn.
Literal seconds for me to realize everything I said to her was dumb as fuck. I wasn’t speaking from my heart. I was speaking out of anger and rejection. Of remembering how much it hurt to lose her and panicking, I might never get a shot to love her again.
And I regret every word. I don’t want Harper to forget me. I don’t want her to push me out. I want Harper in my fuckin’ arms. I want her in my bed. In the back of my truck, looking at stars.
Quite simply, I don’t care about her fake engagement. Fake is fake. What we had… it was real. And I ain’t giving up. I always regretted not fighting for her back then. I will not make the same mistake.
By the time the barn is in sight, I’ve grappled with my head. I’ve listened to my heart. Harper Jones ain’t getting away from me again. And I didn’t mean a damn word of what I said. Not a single one, except the part where I still love her.
I dismount Seven and tie him up to the post outside the stable. I turn as Harper approaches on Penny.
And I’m there by her side. Holding out my arms. Operation Win My Girl Back is officially in motion.
“Ace, I think it’s best if I just do this myself,” she sniffles.
I can’t do this. I cannot push this woman away and be okay with it. I’m not wired that way.
“Harper Amelia Jones. Look at me,” I tell her, keeping my voice steady.
Slowly, she does.
She smiles, wiping away her tears, trying to pretend with me she’s fine, when we both know she isn’t.
I gesture with my hands, just how we used to do it. It’s like I keep poking a fire to see if it still hurts, but oddly, finding comfort in it.
She dismounts and falls right into my arms. And she laughs.
A real laugh. The one my Harper used to do. One of my favorite sounds in the world.
I don’t set her down, I just hold her.
“Ace,” she whispers.
I glance down, and she’s looking dead at me.
Her hand comes up and rests on my cheek.
I can’t let this woman go. I don’t want her to let me go either.
“What are we doing, Goldie? Why are we both pretendin’ that this could ever end?” I whisper.
She sniffles, and a fresh wave of tears rolls down her cheeks.
I lean in, and I kiss them away. Every single one. Softly. Closing my eyes and taking this moment in.
My lips on her soft skin.
Her body melting against mine like it’s the first time we’ve both relaxed in years.
“I’m sorry I made you cry, pretty girl.”
She shakes her head and buries it into my shoulder.
“This is why I had to stay away, Ace. Because I knew I’d fall apart in your arms and you’d make it your life goal to put me back together again. And this time, this mess is mine to fix, not yours.”
I run my fingers through her soft curls.
“I just want you to be happy, Harper. That’s all I ever wanted. I hate seeing you cry, you know that.”
