Love nodded, and I went on. As I walked through the house, I thought about what I could do or say for him to know we were good for real, but I didn’t know what to do.
Once I made it upstairs, I was about to knock on Amir’s door when he walked out.
“Good morning, Amir,” I said softly, looking at the look on his face.
“Good morning, Islah,” he said low. I already knew what was wrong.
I opened my arms, and he ran to me, squeezing my waist tight.
“I had a dream about Mom last night.”
I looked down at him.
“Come sit down and talk to me.”
We walked into my room and sat on the edge of the bed. I got Amir some tissues while he stared at the floor.
“Do you think my mom was mad at me because I wanted to live with Dad?” he asked.
I exhaled. “To be honest with you…yes. But I don’t think that had to do with you; I think that had to do with me.”
Amir agreed. “Yeah, me too. She hoped that Dad would want to get back together, but I told her Dad was happy.”
“Listen, that is grown-up stuff that you don’t need to worry about. All I want you to focus on is how much your mom loved you, and how she will still be with you, and how proud of you she is.”
That made Amir smile.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes,” I said at the same time Love was walking into the room.
Love sat on the floor in front of us, looking at Amir.
“You know what Islah said is right?”
Amir nodded.
“Your mom loved you more than anything in this world. And I know she would be proud of the way you are holding up. Between her death and Islah being gone, you’ve been through a lot and been holding it together.”
Amir nodded, but I could see his little lip quiver.
“I don’t think I will be strong today.”
He wrapped his arms back around me and cried into my chest as I looked at Love. The pain his son was feeling was starting to hit him.
“You don’t have to be, baby,” I said, letting Amir know. “You can cry, scream, or talk to your mom. Whatever you need to do to feel better, you do it. You know why? Because nobody can tell you how to feel, but what we can do is comfort you, and me and your father will always do that.”
“I couldn’t have said that better myself,” Love expressed.
I smiled, and he winked back at me.
“And you get to show everybody how much you loved your mom with this.”
Love handed Amir his chain. It was yellow and white diamonds with his mom’s name, with pictures of them in the middle of the letters. Amir held the chain in his hands.
“Dad, you did your big one!”
That made Love smile.
