“It’s not. I don’t know how to say what I’m trying to say and that’s frustrating me beyond fucking belief. Am I actually over what happened? No. Will I ever be? Probably not. I can’t dwell on it, though. It’ll drown me. I’m not trying to shove it down. I’m trying to grip the small sense of normalcy I felt when I woke up and not let it go.”
Silence settles between us again, but I can tell the difference now. It’s not heavy. They’re waiting for me to keep going.
“I don’t want you all to tiptoe around me or encrypt your conversations. That’s going to do nothing but make me feel like more of a freak than I already am.”
“You’re not a freak,” Kyzen argues.
“She’s definitely freaky.”
All heads snap to Riven, including mine.
His wink and the kiss he blows me first shock me. Then it obviously shocks my entire system.
My laugh bursts free before I can stop it. It continues to ring loudly throughout the whole house, and I struggle to breathe through the fit. Tears tumble out of the corners of my eyes as I tilt my head back.
“Damn. I think I broke her.”
The laughter tapers off as I catch my breath and wipe my face clean. A few snorts straggle out, and I clear my voice while attempting to compose myself.
“Do you ever think before you speak?” Amick asks.
“Not typically. I’m usually just as surprised with what comes out of my mouth as you guys are.”
Oh my gods.
I cover my face as more chuckles crawl up my throat. There’s no doubt I’m the shade of a berry.
“I needed that,” I say as I dab my eyes with my shirt. “You’re so full of fucking shit, Riven.”
“I’m going to take that as a compliment, thank you very much.”
His brothers scoff at him, and he wiggles his eyebrows at them.
Valories, that’s my little psycho.
The thought has me exhaling deeply. They all sense the shift.
“No, I’m not fine. Yes, I will be. I just want you all to treat me the same way you were prior to this happening. Can you all do that for me? Please.”
Their answers are immediate. In their nods, on their faces, and across their souls. The weight I was holding in my shoulders lifts and I slump.
“Thank you.”
“You have nothing to thank us for, Thayla. We’re going to do whatever you need us to do.” The heat in Amick’s eyes make mine flare. Thankfully, he turns them to Kyzen before I melt into a puddle.
“As for what was discussed, nothing about what happened to Thayla was addressed and the Chancellors all purposefully left notes out about the Power Worthiness Test. Aside from Ellian.”
Shit. How did I forget about that?
Never mind. Dumb question.
“The High Chancellor is going to announce the change in a couple of days, exactly one week from the measuring. A decree will be sent to all completed Valtrues then. He didn’t statewhether he was going to discuss this with me first or like the others, we’ll just receive the decree when it arrives.”
“Have you thought about a way out of this for us?” Creed asks.
Amick’s lips fall flat. “No, and we royally angered the one person who could get us out of it.”
Fuck, I forgot about that too.
