The pinched smile she gives Kyzen and me as she steps over to Yemi is as unconvincing as the words that left her lips.
Their hushed whispers follow them out my door, but Kyzen’s chuckle fills the space, and he perches himself on the side of my desk.. “How long are you giving them to find those books before you go find them?”
“An hour max.”
“Why didn’t you gather them for her if you knew she wouldn’t know where to find them?”
“Two reasons. First, she grows tired of being in here all day. Making her go find her own material gets her out of the confines of these walls and challenges her to learn her way around. Two, something shifted between her and Yemi last night. I’m trying to give her time to explore that a little more. Soon, they’ll have no alone time together.”
“Uh, I’ve been thinking about that a lot lately. I’m kicking myself for not figuring out a way to have separate rooms.”
“What does that matter?”
“What do you mean? We’re all going to be in a room together, so neither you nor me are going to have any alone time with her. Creed and Riven will be there the whole time.”
“I still don’t see the issue. That’ll be good for them.”
“What—okay, you know what, we’ve got to have a talk about this.”
His words are making no sense. It’s as though he’s forgotten how to put whole sentences together.
“I’m finding it difficult to understand your choppy thoughts. Can you say what it is you want to say all at once?”
“We, Amick, as in you and me, are in a relationship with Thayla. Her and my relationship has moved into both emotional and physical. Now that the five of us are going to be sharing a room for weeks, we won’t be able to be physical because there will be two additional men, who are not in our relationship, in the same room as us.
“I’m not understanding what you’re not understanding. Ever since she told us she had feelings for them, and all the little comments you’ve made, it feels like you’re trying to pull the two of them into our relationship.”
He jerks himself off my desk and spins back around to face me with his hands on his hips.
“I know all of those obvious facts. I’m not trying to pull them into our relationship. They already have their own relationship with Thayla. I want them to see it for what it is already.”
His face flinches. “You said she had your blessing to pursue a relationship if she wanted. She hasn’t expressed that any further, so why are you pushing it? Why has your opinion on this changed so dramatically since the first conversation we had about us being with her?”
I sigh out loud for the first time in a long time. The noise has Kyzen’s face contorting.
“When the topic of this first came up, no, I didn’t want them in a relationship with her, but I was also missing a lot of facts and overlooking crucial details.”
I sit in my chair and wave my hand toward Thayla’s for him. He looks at it as though it’s going to bite him, then back at me again for clarification.
My blank stare is answer enough.
“It’s easy for me to work out the logical side of things, but it’s taken me time to see the emotional. I’m honestly shocked you haven’t put it together yet on your own. Or maybe you have and you’re avoiding it because you’re still coping with the fact that the woman you’re falling in love with has feelings for multiple men. All of whom are your brothers.”
He grits his teeth and turns his head from me. His hands grip the armrest of her chair so hard, his veins are protruding.
“It’s not just easy to accept, Amick.”
“Is it me you’re having difficulty accepting?”
“No. I accepted our arrangement easily. It’s Creed and Riven.”
“It’s not that it’s easy for me. I struggle with it as well, especially when I see them hold back from her and it hurts her.”
“Yeah, exactly. So why does it feel like you’re getting ready to lecture me into some understanding of why we should be okay with this right this second?”
“Because who else will they ever have? Who in this realm will ever accept them?”
His laboring chest falls still. The long exhale he releases whistles through his lips as every feature in his face falls.
