“I constantly feel dirty,” Ryker spits out. “The only thing that makes me feel good is collecting knowledge. Reading, learning how to fight better, anything that increases…ugh.” He growls in frustration. “I have a dark soul that I’ll never get rid of.” He plops down on the carpet, and I look up at everyone around me.
No one has said anything about anyone else’s comments besides the chuckle for Moni, but they all look defeated as they lie around the carpet, and they shouldn’t be.
“I know what you’re all thinking,” I begin. “You’re all thinking that what you just shared are the worst parts of you, and I hate to break to you, but they might be. We’re in Hell, and it is Hell’s job to bring out our worst, but that doesn’t make you YOU! Levi, you’re our leader. Our most logical person here because you don’t want to fail. You’re going to look at all the possibilities and decide which one is going to work the best,” I point out and smirk at him.
Turning, I look at my Alpha and shoot love down our link. “Knox, you might call yourself a murderer, but I don’t, and your family doesn’t. You fight with efficiency to keep usaliveandsafe. Turning off those emotions to help you think clearly doesnot make you a murderer, and I won’t have my mate thinking that again. Do you hear me?” I purse my lips and glare at my mate. I only get a slight tug at his lips in return, but I consider it a win.
“Moni and Chester, you guys are perfect for each other. Moni needs a yes-man for all the shit she’s been through, and you can never go wrong with romance for her,” I tell the couple as I see them snuggling in close.
Looking at Knots next, I narrow my eyes and purse my lips, and he gives me a pitiful look. “I have so much baggage with you that I’m waiting at a damn airport terminal. You are inconsiderate, but you also give yourself to those whom you deem worthy to protect. As for giving up too easily for the things you want, I’m not sure what you mean by that, but I suggest working on that. Maybe this is a come-to-Jesus moment in the bowels of Hell—how ironic that is—so learn from it. But it’s not the end of the world.”
Before Knots can fire back at me and start World War III, I turn to JP. “JP, I have to ask. Are you scared of commitment with me and the guys or something else?” JP’s eyes widen, and he’s quick to answer.
“Oh shit. No. I don’t mean in our relationship. I mean in other things, like my painting or decorating, or cooking, or sewing. When it comes to picking a profession and claiming to go to Earth, I have no idea,” he declares, throwing his hands in the air, almost hitting Zeke.
“JP, relax. Obviously, things are different between Purgatory and Earth, but you’re allowed to like different things on Earth. Most people don’t stick with the same job forever there. Hell, most people are lucky to stick with the same job for a year. Having all of your interests is a good thing; you’ll be able to try out a lot of things, and if it’s not a job, we call them hobbies onEarth, and you can still do them,” I explain, trying to calm him down.
“Really?” I nod and smile as he leans and eases back into Zeke’s embrace.
“As for you, Lynx. You should know who you are without me.” I gently move Reaper out of my lap and plop down in Lynx’s lap, allowing him to wrap me in his arms. “You are the same person you are with me. Strong, funny, versatile, and indestructible. If anything, I am nothing without you. I fell apart when you were taken away. You are a lot stronger than you give yourself credit for.”
“Thank you, Rezzi-bear, but you’ve been my whole world for so long, I really don’t know any other way.” He squeezes me and lightly kisses my lips.
“Then I’ll have to show you a different way and make you believe,” I gently nip at his jaw, making him laugh.
I lean into him and turn to face Ryker, who is on the other side of Lynx. Ryker’s admission that he constantly feels dirty and has a dark soul bothers me. There’s nothing wrong with wanting knowledge and seeking it out when he can. I don’t know where this is coming from, but I need to set him straight.
“Have you ever considered that the emptiness you feel is the Fae side of you?” Ryker’s brows furrow in thought, and it’s clear he has no idea what I’m talking about. “Remember the first time we met?” I smirk, reminiscing the time I ruined his sexy time with Red-heeled Barbie. “I was sitting in your study reading a very fascinating book about the origins of the Supernatural Creatures. You are Pestilence. Out of everyone, you supposedly have the darkest soul,” I explain, using air quotes and rolling my eyes. “And you’ll want to constantly conquer. I think it stated something about no land, power, or knowledge would be enough. Does that sound familiar?” I cock an eyebrow as thelight bulb clicks on, and he grins at me, feeling better about that side of him.
Hell, even I feel lighter when I see everyone appear more serene until Moni innocently opens her big fat stinkin’ mouth. “What about you, bestie?”
I unconsciously flinch in Lynx’s lap, and he tightens his hold around my waist. My breathing slightly increases as I break out into a cold sweat, recalling my time in my tunnel. The last piece that I didn’t want to be true. It couldn’t be. Even if all the clues point to that last fact, I don’t want to accept it. If I could only will back time for seven seconds and swallow up Moni, I would do it in a heartbeat. Or maybe just permanently silence her; that would be fan-fucking-tab-u-lous.
‘You okay, Rezzi-bear?’Lynx asks, running his thumb along my forearm as I try to relieve my rapidly burning lungs to some semblance of calm.
‘No. I’m not even close,’I admit.
“It’s okay, Kitten,” Knox coaxes as he squeezes between Lynx and Moni and Chester. “We won’t judge you, just like you didn’t judge us.” I almost snort at his statement.
It’s not because he’s wrong that I didn’t judge him; it’s the fact that they wouldn’t be able to help but judge. It’s like stating you’re related to Jack the Ripper, Ted Bundy, Jeffrey Dahmer, or Lady Bluebird.
“Hmph. How rude! We were here first,” Moni pouts, pulling me out of my freakout. Chester squeezes her tight against his chest as he slides over, making more room for Knox.
“It’s okay. Rez needs Knox more right now, but you still have me,” Chester mutters, and Moni quickly giggles.
Knowing I can’t escape my fate, I blow out a breath and bow my head. If I’m going to say this, I can’t look at them while I admit it.
“I was struggling, looking for my last piece. It was for my right hand, and all the pieces I could find just wouldn’t work. Either it was already used, or I was the problem, and I couldn’t accept them for whatever reason,” I admit, letting out another sigh. Reaper crawls and snuggles back into my lap, and I wrap my arms around his flames as my body soaks in his heat. “This little guy was the one that found the missing piece. It wasn’t a part of any of the mirrors that we saw on our way through the level, so I had no idea what to expect when Reaper brought it to me. But…seeing the tattoo of the Rebels on my wrist with Sulks in my right palm…wasn’t it.”
No one says anything, an uncomfortable pause settling into my gut as my fears or their judgment sets in. Finally, I take a moment to look up, finding everyone motionless. “Ha. Ha. Very funny,” I deadpan, giving the group a hurt look. Most wear expressions of shock, while Levi has a calculating look on his face. “You’re going to give me a complex,” I tell him, and he doesn’t say anything…or blink. Releasing my hold on Reaper, I’m shocked to notice him not moving either, as if he’s frozen in place. I lift him and set him down beside me, but he doesn’t blink, bark, breathe, or anything.
What the hell? I stand up, looking around the group and realizing that everyone except me is frozen solid. Grabbing Levi’s phone next to him, I watch his clock app and realize that even time on his device has stopped.
“Hello!” I call out while searching the area to make sure we’re alone.
Yep! Now I’m the dumb bimbo who calls out in Horror B-Movie.
Who’s powerful enough to stop time? My hands slip close to my glaives just in case whoever froze my family makes themselves known. We’re in a safe house, so you would think we would be, you know,safe,but then again, this is Hell. Keepingmy back toward my friends, I scan the perimeter and jump at every little sound.Well, I guess that solves the question that time isn’t frozen for everyone, just my group since I can still hear things outside the house.The moans from the Despair level cause the fine hairs on my arms to rise, and I desperately wish my friends to wake up from this damn nightmare. After my second round of circling the desolate ruin, I finally determine that whoever decided to freeze time is just fucking with me.
