“My sweet, Rez. Please forgive me for lying to you,” she says between her labored breaths. “I was only trying to keep you safe.” I grab her hand and bring it to my cheek. Lynx, Levi, and a few others gather around and start digging into their bags, searching for bandages and supplies to help my mom while I try to keep her calm, but even I know it would take a miracle to fix this.
“I know, Mom,” I tell her through my tears. I try to smile as I lay my hand over her dime-size wound to staunch the bleeding. “I know, Jillian!”
“Jillian, you’ll be fine. Just save your energy, and we’ll get you to Dr Steinbeck. Just hold on,” Ryker assures her. “We just have to take you through the portal,” he states matter-of-factly. He jumps up and runs from us to hopefully open the portal so we can use it.
“Shit!” Ryker curses. “Is the portal behind this door? The door is locked! Where’s the key? How do we get in?” he yells, yanking at his hair.
“Shouldn’t the portal be available now that we passed the trials?” Lynx’s voice is spiked with fear.
“The switch to power back on all the portals was locked and sealed by Liliwen before she died,” Jillian wheezes, dropping another bomb on us.
“Do you know how to open it? We need to save you,” I plead, choking on my tears.
“There’s no saving me, but you can finish your quest.” She coughs, and her body starts to shake as I press her hand harder against my cheek. “It’s behind the door. Your marks are the key. Your mother gave them to you, and t-the song…unlocks them.” She coughs blood, and tears start to pool in her eyes.
The song opens them? What is she talking about? Why be so cryptic?Is she just confused? Tears blur the image of my mother and I quickly wipe them away.
“Mom! You know cryptic things don’t work well with me,” I try to remind her, but a muscle in her cheek jerks as if she can’t give me a smile anymore.
JP jumps up and joins Ryker at the sealed door where the portal is hiding, and I focus back on Mom when she tries to reach for her necklace.
“Rez, take my necklace. It..w-was…your…mom’s.” She manages to get out between breaths and lightly squeezes my hand.
“It’s okay, Mom, just hold on a little longer. JP and Ryker are working to open the wall,” I say with a trembling voice.
Jillian’s lips move, but I can’t hear her, so I lean in closer. “...loved you…l-like my…own.”
“Mom!” I grab her face as she closes her eyes and takes her last breath. “NO! Wait!” I cry out, not ready to let her go. I lost her once before, but I never got to say goodbye. I thought having a chance to say goodbye would make things easier, but I’m wrong. This is physically killing me, having my heart ripped into shreds as my entire life crumbles into nothing all over again.
I lay my head against her chest and weep, but only a few minutes later, her body starts shaking slightly, and I bolt up. Before my eyes, her body shimmers, and her appearance changes. Her brunette hair fades to a short blonde bob. She shrinks slightly and becomes a petite woman with no curves. Her brown eyes turn a crystal blue, and her skin turns out to be porcelain instead of my sepia tone like my own. No longer does she look like my mother for the past two decades, but she does look familiar. Where have I seen this version of my mother before?
It doesn’t matter, not right now. I throw myself back on her and let go of all my pain. I sob as the memory of my mother and all that we’ve done plays in my head.
I don’t know how long I lie crying, but soon enough, I’m reduced to sniffles and a massive headache, and I find Lynx kneeling in my periphery.
“Rez?” Lynx says cautiously. I slowly raise my head and wipe away my tears but can’t bring myself to say anything.
He hands something to me, and I furrow my brow, wondering what he has. “It fell out of your pocket, but I think you should look at it,” he gently coaxes me.
Taking a closer look at what he has, I recognize the picture. It’s the picture of the complete group Beleth just gave me. Now,an X is over the image of Jillian, the real version of her, with her short blonde bob. Curious if I’m missing anything else, I flip it over. On the back, a name appears, and then a line slowly strikes through it.
Jillian Taylor
CHAPTER 39
The Portal
Rez
Idon’t know how long I sit and stare at the picture and my dead mother, but it’s long enough that Knox comes over and pulls me into his arms. It doesn’t matter how many times you mourn a death. It never leaves you. It only depends on how strong it is that day. And today…it’s a fucking hurricane Cat six.
“I’m sorry, Kitten, but we need to go,” he coaxes, sending all his love and warmth throughout our bond.
“You’re right. I’ll have time to mourn and get my shit together once we get out of here.” I smile up at him, patting his hard pec. “You can put me down. It’s just another day in Hell. I can do this.” I ignore the doubtful look on his face and turn toward the wall that’s hiding the portal, only to frown. “Wait. What are we going to do with my mother?”
I turn to find Knots carrying her in a white blanket.
“It’s only right to bury her once we get to Purgatory,” he admits and hands out her necklace for me. My heart swells with appreciation for my protector. Even though things are a mess between us, he’s still watching over me, physically andemotionally. I’m a complete wreck, but he’s lifting some of the stress that I’m carrying, so I give him a small smile and take her necklace.
