“She had her suspicions for a while. She found weird stuff like lingerie she knew she didn’t buy and even a dildo. It’s just so crazy.” Carla shakes her head.
“What happened when she went inside?” I ask, not sure I need to know details, but also kind of dying to know it’s just that scandalous.
“There was his mistress on all fours with a butt plug in just waiting to be fucked.”
My eyes widen, and I can’t help but laugh. “No.”
Shea nods, biting into her bottom lip. “Yes. How mortifying. She had to skip town. Anyway, it kind of has a happy ending because she grabbed the keys to his camper van and took off. She hasn’t been back, and I think it’s been like six months or something.”
“Shea taught her how to meditate.”
“Hopefully it will help, but really, how do you get over life changing stuff like that?”
“Yeah, I’m not sure you do. Wait, are you like a meditation teacher or something?” I ask, curious. I have always wanted to learn how to meditate. Talon talked about it in one of our earlier sessions, but I just thought I wasn’t the right type of person for it.
Shea shrugs. “Meditation, yoga, reiki, I can do it all, girl. I’ll give you some lessons if you stick around long enough.”
“Might just take you up on that offer.” I smile back. These girls are so nice and normal. So opposite from what I have been dealing with lately that I think this is just what I need.
We run down into the water and dive under a wave. I catch a few then take my board out back to where it’s not breaking and float. I could get used to this life. New friends, surfing, meditation, sounds like the life. I mean, I’m going to run out of money by the end of the week and die of starvation, but at least I will be running my own life, not one dictated by some bikers I owe money to or the Thrones.
Chapter 17
Dove
After a BBQ down the beach, my new friends and I fell asleep under the stars with a small fire burning in a drum beside us and woke up with the sun warming our skin. It’s the best night’s sleep I have had in so long.
I did a morning yoga class with them and then tried out meditation. Turns out I like the idea of it more than the act. My brain is too messy to sit quietly and not have thoughts racing through it. Mostly of the boys, even though I willed my brain to stop it. Their stupid faces keep haunting me. But I did my best and told the girls it was life-changing because I know that’s what they wanted to hear, and they have been so nice to me.
After that, I came back to my van to deal with reality, maybe go through the little safe again, the threats my mum received starting to play on my mind. Why was someone blackmailing her? Just because she was involved with Keller Throne or was there more to it? Did she help Keller get something passed by the council? That’s all I can think it could have been. Then someone working for my mum must have worked it out and thought they could get money out of her for it. There is also the fact she was clearly having some sort of affair with Keller. That one makes me cringe. He might have carried the tall, dark,and handsome Throne genes, but seriously, the man was all kinds of awful. How could she possibly have gotten close to him? And to be cheating on my dad as well is just pure disgusting. He was so loyal to her, loved her with everything he had, and she did this to him. Pain lodges itself in my chest at the thought. The whole thing is inexcusable. And I know for a fact my mum wouldn’t have ever wanted that as public knowledge, no matter what Keller wanted. It would have destroyed her perfect family image and maybe even stopped her getting reelected. But who would’ve wanted to hurt her by outing her secrets to the world? That’s what I can’t work out.
I think back to the crazy story the girls told me last night. Did my dad walk in on them or something? It would have affected us more than anyone. But he wouldn’t have been blackmailing her, and truth is, my dad was the kind of man who wouldn’t hurt a fly. If he knew, he would have gone one of two ways. He would have turned a blind eye so our life wouldn’t have changed at all, or he would have packed our shit and got us both out of there. The image of the suitcases sitting at his feet that night comes back to me. He was ready to leave that night before she was killed. Did she tell him like Keller wanted her to? Why can’t I remember.
Since then, I have been lying on the beach with the girls, too many thoughts racing through my mind. I roll from my front to my back and bury my head in my towel. The sun is hot today. Probably too hot to be lying out, but I don’t want to move either. I’m not sure what to do next. I need more information, shit the boys probably could tell me if they wanted to. Kasen has to know what his dad was up to, right? But I don’t want to go back to Deadwater Bay and demand answers from him. They have taken enough from me over the last few days. There has to be another way I can find out the truth.
“I know I have only just met you, Dove, but I have to ask, are you okay? It’s hard not to notice the bruises on your ribs and back,” Shae asks from her place beside me.
I roll onto my side to face her. “I’m okay, all that shit is in my past.” I offer her a small smile so she knows I’m telling the truth.
Her brow furrows. “Okay. We’re here if you need to talk, girl.”
I move to sitting up, taking a swig of my water bottle from beside me. It’s hot today. “Where are you girls heading next? Maybe I can come with you?”
“You really are on the run from something.”
“Have you ever just felt like you don’t know where you fit in, like where home should be? I don’t know, it’s hard to explain. But for years I have felt uncomfortable in my own skin, and just recently I spent some time in my old hometown, the place I grew up, and it was like home again. But I can’t stay there, there is too much history for me.”
Shea sits up, looking me over in an assessing way that makes her look wise. “I like to go with my gut on all the big life decisions. If I feel light when I think of my next move, I know it’s right, but if I feel weighed down or get that sinking feeling I avoid it like the plague.”
“Can you feel light and heavy at the same time?” I ask, not sure my gut knows what to think. There is a huge part of me that wants to go back and finish my hunt for answers, but it’s more than that. I know deep down I have unfinished business with the boys as well, and that makes my stomach sink as much as I get the dancing butterflies when I’m around them.
“Sure, you can. Maybe you just need more time to know what it is you really want.”
“Yeah, maybe.”
Carla smirks up at me. “Is there a boy involved? That always messes with my gut radar.”
“Maybe.” Or three, but I’m not admitting that to these nice normal girls.
