I squint out the window at Elise before saying, “Fine, Duchess, but don’t tell him anything about you. If that means he doesn’t give you any information, then fine. Don’t mention your name, your university, anything, understand?”
“He thinks I’m dead,” she says. “Remember?”
“Yeah, so he’s gonna have questions.”
“Konnor,” she says, reaching out to stoke my cheek. “He won’t be able to find me. I live in a different town. I live a different life with a different name. I will be fine. I’m going to tell him who I am. But give him nothing else."
I massage my temples. “Kiss me,” I order like it’s the only rational thing to do now. She leans in and presses her mouth to mine. As her tongue teases my lips, I fist her hair, pulling her in more deeply—desperately. I love her.God, do I love her.The thought of someone hurting herkillsme. I pull away and look at her. Stern. “Be careful.”
“He can’t hurt me in there.”
“Here...” I tap her chest. “He can hurt you here.”
Her face softens. “I won’t let him.”
Then she is out of the car, talking to Elise, and too soon, walking with Elise through both layers of fencing, then through the sliding doors, and out of sight.
My face tightens, molars clamping together as I step from the car and make my way towards Jax.
I slump down on the grass beside his feet. He drops down beside me, and we both stare at the sky.
I can feel my frown. It almost hurts. What will happen in there? Will the guards search her or Elise? The thought alone makes my ears burn. What if her dad tries to touch her? What if he lunges at her? I groan at the thought and rub my face roughly with both hands.
“Say something,” I groan, wanting Jax to take my mind off the images in my head. “You clearly have something to say, so just fucking say it.”
He scoffs, but it’s pained, and fuck. That’s my fault. Guilt punches me in the gut. “Fine,” he announces, “I will. This isn’t normal. This whole thing, you and her, the intensity of it. You have started doing this awesome new thing where you phase the fuck out, and it is just fucking magical. I mean, really, it’s like you aren’t even there anymore. It’s really freaking me out, and yet, you won’t tell me what’s going on. It’s fucked up and it’s making you act like a psycho.”
I entwine my fingers and cup the back of my head. “Maybe I was always a psycho. You just didn’t know it.”
He sighs against the grass, lifting his hands and cushioning the back of head just like me. What a fucking pair of dickheads, we look. “I’ve known you for a while now. I knew you have an issue with confined spaces. Figured that out pretty fast. No elevators. No Basement Lounge. No tunnels. But… you’ve known this girl for, like, what? Five seconds? And whenever she’s around, you’re in this weird daze, like you’re not even Konnor anymore.”
I turn to look at him. “It’s not her. It’s…us.”
He makes eye contact with me momentarily, before turning back to the sky. “Listen, Slater, the past month you have been acting crazy, missing practice, missing games, missing classes, missing fucking grad classes.”
“Oh, come on,” I groan, my body humming for intoxication of any kind. I’d take a punch to the head at this rate. “It has been one fucking month. Get over it.”
“Yeah, it has been a month. One month of you acting like a complete lunatic.”
I roll my eyes. “I have known her a lot longer than you. I’ve known her for seventeen years."
“Right," he drawls. "When you were children.”
“Don’t say it like that! You have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“Well, then tell me!”
“I can’t,” I snap.
“I like B. You know I do. She’s a cool chick. But you two are crazy together. Way, way too intense. Too… I don’t know. Just too much. I keep feeling like I need to watch out for shrapnel 'cause you’re gonna explode at any moment.”
He’s so right.
“Yeah, I feel like that, too,” I mumble.
“You know that isn’t normal, right? That kind of intensity? You are meant to improve each other’s lives, not derail them.”
I frown at the sky. “No, it isn’t normal. It’s phenomenal! Every goddamn part of it. I’m totally okay with the intensity. I’ve been in love with her forever, since before I can remember anyone else, and I am not ashamed to say it. I don’t care if I sound like a pussy. I just don’t care. Her face has more familiarity, seems more like family, and has more connections to the word home than any other face on earth. We are working through things at the moment, Jax. Things will get better; it just isn’t a quick fix.”
