‘I’ve met some of you before, but not all,’ Greg said, with a smoker’s gravel. ‘I’m Greg, the chairman. This is Mindy, my PA, and Elizabeth, our COO – and my wife.’ It was a cat’s cradle of arms as we all shook hands, one after the other, until I realised I was shaking hands with Leo. The smooth, soft hand that had held me as we’d danced, and traced patterns across my back in bed. I dropped it as if it were on fire, ignoring his hurt expression.
Brooke stood in front of the screen and took control. ‘OK, good morning everyone, thank you to both agencies for coming in today. We are excited to see how you’ve approached the brief. Greg’s team have cleared three hours in his diary for the presentations, including time for any questions, so we should get right on with it.’
Heidi and I sat opposite Leo and Zach, all four of us fake smiling to play nice in front of the grown-ups. Leo’s eyebrow twitched as he looked at me, and I couldn’t help but think he was mocking me somehow. Bastard.
‘Amplify have asked to go first if you gals don’t mind,’ Brooke said, giving us no choice in the matter. ‘Zach needs to dash once they’ve finished presenting.’
‘Absolutely fine,’ Heidi said with a smile. ‘Shit before the broom,’ she side-mouthed.
Leo leapt straight into presenter mode, while Zach fiddled around in the background.
‘Thank you, Brooke. Then let me begin. Ladies and gentlemen, we are here today because we want your business. We make no bones about that. Amplify are the marketing brains behind several holiday companies as you know: Tui, Hilton Hotels, Virgin Holidays…’ As he said the names, Zach flashed the logos up on screen. ‘And we want to add a cruise company to that list. Not just any cruise company – the best in the market. Excalibur Cruises.’
Oh, he was good. His whole demeanour saidI’m your manand it was difficult not to get on board as he nodded slowly to himself then smiled at each of the clients, pausing when he reached Greg. I nearly started nodding myself.
Zach lay their boards face down on the table, while Leo trotted through the strategy slides, outlining the thinking that had led to theirbig idea. Then once he’d whet their appetite and they were desperate to see the creative, he paused.
‘Time for the show,’ he said, gesturing to Zach, who started turning the boards over like a game show host. Brooke got up and walked to the front to get a closer look, as I scanned the copy underneath the illustrations. I couldn’t help but gasp as the words came into focus. Their line was our line. It was our idea.
‘Unimaginable moments,’ Zach said. ‘Two simple words, but a rich creative territory to play with.’ He flashed a photoof the four of us at the silent disco and then another of Leo and I whale watching. A montage quickly followed. Photo after photo, each telling a different story. The dining room at sunrise, a couple snorkelling with manta rays. Thiago in full captain regalia on the bow of the boat. Barbie Queue performing at the drag cabaret. A sunset over Madeira. ‘We’ve taken hundreds of photos from our trip, showing the richness and range of moments we had on our cruise. Two weeks that could easily be mistaken for six months.’
Oh my God.I glanced at the clock. We were on in fifty minutes, I needed to think fast. How could we spin our presentation to be something entirely different in time for our slot? I opened my notepad and pretended to take notes, scribbling so Heidi could see.
WTF???? Shall we revert to Phileas Fogg?
She shook her head and picked up her pencil.
‘A new generation of cruisers’ or ‘Cruising for a new generation’ Do the opposite of this. Go practical for the audience he wants. ‘Generation Cruise’.
We needed to agree.
What about existing customers?
They’ll be dead soon. I’ll talk around it.
I pushed my chair back slowly, trying to be quiet, but it scraped across the floor and six sets of eyeballs turnedto look at me. ‘Apologies,’ I winced. ‘I need to use the bathroom.’ I left as quickly as I could, bashing my hip on the table and knocking one of the boards over as I reached the door. ‘Sorry, sorry.’
‘She’s having some trouble,’ I heard Heidi whisper as I left. Honestly, was there ever a scenario where she wouldn’t feel comfortable throwing me under the bus? My hands were shaking as I pulled out my phone to call the office.
‘Hello? Natalya? Are you there?’
‘She’s just in a meeting – can I help? This is James.’ He was a freelance designer we’d hired to work on the pitch.
‘Hi, James, it’s Kat. We’ve got a nightmare problem, and I need some new designs for the Excalibur pitch.’
‘Say that again? You’re cutting out, which pitch?’
‘Ex-cal-i-bur,’ I said, nice and slow.
‘Sure thing. I can jump on it after lunch; I’m just finishing an urgent job for…’
‘This ismoreurgent,’ I hissed. ‘The most urgent of urgent jobs.’
‘Right. OK. No problem.’
Bollocks.Robo-designer did not understand the severity of the situation.
‘Is Natalya interruptible?’
