‘Come on now, love, this isn’t good for Sara’s stress levels,’ Dad said, while Mum pulled out a box of matches. ‘Vivian donotlight that sage. This is a hospital!’
Three matches in a row snapped under the strength of Mum’s mania, before she gave up and wafted the sage bundle around as it was. ‘It’s precisely because this hasn’t been done that she’s in this mess.’
‘Er… hello? Iamhere?’
‘Yes, Sara, we can see that! And how do you think it makes me feel, knowing I’m to blame?’
‘You’re not to blame, Mum.’
‘I am. I should have cleansed that dreadful office of yours months ago. It stinks of decay and bad decisions, and don’t even get me started on your flat. God knows what those tenants were up to while you were at ours; it’s filled to the brim with negative energy.’ She bit her lip, and Dad put his arm around her.
‘No point going through the should’ves now, is there, love? Let’s keep the focus on Sara, shall we? On the here and now.’
‘What do you think I’m doing?’ she said, brandishing the sage at him like a shaman expelling a demon.
I closed my eyes to shut out her nonsense, but the bell was too loud. There’d be no peace until she’d finished.
‘What have the doctors said, then?’ Dad asked, while Mum carried on carrying on.
‘They think it was a panic attack, which is ridiculous – what have I got to panic about?’ The beeping from the heart monitor picked up pace and Dad gave me a look. ‘What?!’
‘Let’s be real, love; it’s only us here now,’ he said, gently. ‘You’ve been running yourself ragged and you know it.’
‘You’re worn out,’ Mum agreed, her energy finally spent. ‘Working sixty hours a week, with all this Mark stuff going through on top. It’s been too much. Staying with us probably hasn’t helped.’
‘It has! I’d have had nowhere to go otherwise. I’ve really appreciated having you there, and it was only a temporary solution – I’m back in the flat now.’
‘That you are. Which is a step in the right direction,’ Dad said. ‘As long as you don’t spend the hour you’ve saved working. You need time to rest and play too.’
‘It’s been a lot for me and your father, so I can only imagine how you must feel.’
‘You’re a stress sponge, Sara,’ Dad said. ‘Absorbing it all in with no complaints, and now it’s too heavy to carry. Time to put it all down.’
‘Knock, knock,’ Dr Fielding called, whipping back the curtain to reveal several other people on the ward. He immediately clocked the sage bundle in Mum’s hand.
‘Just giving the space a quick cleanse,’ she said, with a reassuring smile.
I shrank under the sheets, as the monitor kicked in again, my heartbeat back to normal.
‘Can we take Sara home?’ Dad asked.
‘I think so, yes. There won’t be any medication dispensed, but please think about your lifestyle and try and make good choices when it comes to diet and exercise.’
I instinctively took a deep breath to oxygenate myself.
‘Exactly,’ he said with a smile. ‘You might also consider taking some time off work. I’d be happy to write to your GP.’
‘This is what we’ve been saying, Sara,’ Dad chided.
‘I am taking time off – I’m on annual leave for the next two weeks.’
‘Right. Well then, that’s a good start,’ Dr Fielding said.
‘It is,’ Mum said, solemnly. ‘Sara, you must do exactly as the doctor says. He’s here to help.’
‘Of course, I can only advise you.’ The doctor finished tapping his notes into his iPad. ‘Entirely up to you what you choose to do with it.’
I breathed a sigh of relief. Advisory was fine. A fortnight pottering around the flat and I’d be right as rain. I just needed a bath and a Snickers.
‘Most people would be thrilled to have some time off work,’ Mum said, fussing dramatically. ‘You’ll stress yourself into an early grave at this rate. No one “makes partner” in heaven, you know.’
Dad nodded his agreement. ‘No pockets in shrouds.’
‘I don’t want any pockets – what are you two talking about?’ The heart monitor started beeping. ‘Why can’t you understand how important this promotion is to me? I’m at a critical stage in the process and I just need your support.’
I wanted to scream, but I was conscious of three sets of eyes on me and the heart monitor giving me away. I swallowed down my panic and smiled sweetly. ‘Thank you for the advice, Doctor. I’ll get myself home, then see how I feel.’
No one could force me to stay off work. I’d have my two weeks at home and that would be that.
