Katy rolled her eyes, shaking her head. ‘Oh my God, no! Not on the street anyway. We have to target them at gyms or at clubs. On the street they usually ignore us, or creepy guys want to try out their dodgy pick-up lines, or they tell us to bolt!’
Tanya burst out laughing, causing her bright orange hair to bounce up and down. ‘Bolt! That’s hilarious.’
Katy grinned, thinking about home – the patter, the fresh cool air – and for the first time, she began to miss it.
‘So, let’s discuss today’s findings.’ Tanya pulled her notebook out. ‘Religion is one of the front-runners we didn’t anticipate.’
‘Yeah, it makes sense. In Glasgow, you’re usually Celtic or Rangers, but over here, my God, I hadn’t heard of half of their religious inclinations.’
‘That’s so weird. I haven’t heard of your Scottish ones! But I do think that religion should be included. There’s no point in dating someone if you would never consider them as a long-term prospect. We want our American girls to find the one!’
Katy sat up, refreshing her phone – no new messages. Thank fuck.
‘I agree! OK, what else should we include?’ Katy asked, feeling her emotions settle down a little.
‘Well, by way of contrast, penis size wasn’t mentioned.’ Tanya side-eyed Katy. ‘I think we should leave it out.’
‘No way!’ Katy groaned. ‘It’ssoimportant!’
Tanya took a sip of her shot in thought. ‘OK, hear me out. Yes, it’s important, but isn’t it a nice surprise too? You get to look forward to it. All that messaging, flirting, anticipation, then bam! The wiener is out!’
‘Wiener!’ Katy giggled. ‘But when it’s small, it’s really not a small disappointment.’
Tanya hummed. ‘Honestly, I disagree. I’ve always found the men with ones on the smaller side are better in other ways.’ She winked. ‘They sure know how to make up for it.’
Katy blushed, then agreed reluctantly. ‘Fine, maybe penis size is too rude for Americans.’
Tanya’s jaw dropped. ‘Girl, we are not scared to talk about sex. But if a counter app launches and it decides to rate us women by our vaginas, then I’m screwed!’
Katy’s face squirmed. ‘Fuck, me too!’ She giggled. ‘Can you imagine, though? There would be outrage! I have way too much meat-to-skin ratio!’
‘Exactly, right? Let’s keep this new app in the headlines for all the right reasons. It’s informative, safe, easy to use – and it’s saving us a lot of freaking time by stopping us making bad mistakes,’ Tanya said.
‘Yep, I sure wish it was available before I came to New York,’ Katy muttered under her breath.
‘Oh, spill! Bad Tinder date? Or hook-up?’ Tanya sat up, eyes widening.
Katy shook her head. ‘Just a total time-waster. OK, so, where are we headed next?’
Tanya picked up her phone and scanned down the list. ‘Times Square! Just outside the office. There’s a huge footfall, especially at lunch.’
‘Great!’
Katy and Tanya finished their drinks and headed back towards the office. They’d spend the rest of their day interviewing women about what was important to them in online dating.
*
That evening, Katy arrived home to find Ella and Zola sprawled out on the sofa, chatting while rewatching another episode ofGossip Girl.
‘Hey! You’ve been working hard!’ Zola called out as Katy’s tired face appeared.
‘How was your day?’ Ella asked, turning down the TV.
‘Yeah, it was fine. Tanya’s lovely,’ Katy replied, sitting beside her friends.
‘No more messages?’ Zola asked, noticing Katy’s usually bright light was dimmed.
Katy shook her head. ‘What if someone does know?’ Even voicing the possibility out loud made her panic.
