‘Please, come in. This is my sister, Fee.’ He nodded to the young woman beside him. ‘Come right on up here.’ Jimmy walked back to his seat, ushering us to follow him. ‘Sit up here, with us. This damn boardroom is too big. I hate how everyone spreads out.’ His informal vibe immediately made me feel more at ease.
‘Thank you.’ I grinned, pulling out a chair and taking a seat beside Fee and Jimmy, my two friends doing the same.
‘So, the floor is all yours, ladies. Why don’t you give me and Fee the lowdown on The Dicktionary Club and how it would benefit the American people. I gotta say, when I read that article, I was blown away by the concept. How did it all come about?’ Jimmy leaned in, seeming excited already.
My two friends looked at me, and Zola nodded her head for me to begin.
‘Well, it actually began because of Katy here.’ I giggled, smiling towards my friend. ‘She hadn’t had the best luck on the dating scene, and the men she was meeting on apps were just awful and getting worse. We thought: why do we leave reviews for everyday products we buy, for tradespeople and restaurants, but we can’t leave reviews for the men we’ve dated? The good, the bad and the ugly, you know?’ I glanced at Fee and saw encouragement and amusement in her brown eyes. ‘So, we developed The Dicktionary Club, a women-only website designed to review the men we encountered on apps and leave honest, reliable feedback – pretty much like Trustpilot – so other women can check out who they might be dating and what you should expect. And, naturally, who to avoid like the plague.’
Jimmy and his sister laughed together and nodded, keen to hear more.
‘It’s genius!’ Jimmy said. ‘Have you considered turning the website into an app before?’
I glanced at Zola, our IT expert, but she was already focused and ready to begin. ‘Yeah, absolutely. I mean, that is the natural next stage, and of course the site is easily transferred with the correct programming skills. Obviously, there are so many apps out there, and we wanted to do it exactly right. We know that if we collaborated with your Flirtify company, Mr Link, creating this type of app would offer unbelievable potential for all of us. We have created a slide deck on everything, if you have time. It runs through all our ideas and the scope, the benefits, the development offer of The Dicktionary Club.’ She sounded confident, totally on it, like I knew she would be. Zola was the actual brains behind the business, understanding how to code and program to create the sleekest, most user-friendly and professional-looking product possible. Without her, we could never have pulled off The Dicktionary Club in the first place. We’d still be stuck at the concept stage.
‘Hell, yeah, for sure we have time.’ Jimmy glanced at Fee, who smiled back.
‘I should probably say, my husband, Travis, will be joining us in due course,’ she said. ‘He’s head of finance here, but he’s just landed from Florida, and he’s stuck in traffic. Don’t let him scare you girls off if he enters mid-pitch now.’
We stood up, shuffling our way towards the back of the room. Like magic, a white screen began slowly sliding down the back wall and the blinds tilted shut, allowing our slide deck to take centre stage in the boardroom.
I took a breath, nodded to my two friends, and began the pitch I had rehearsed a million times – going through the importance of websites like this from a personal safety point of view, delving into Clare’s Law, and speaking about an equivalent for Americans. I finished up by showcasing some reviews from the website. They laughed at the examples I highlighted, from the excessive wanker to the hat-fisher. At that point, Zola took over and explained in detail how she was able to tap into Tinder and the mainstream dating networks, downloading their pool of clients, which allowed us to create our own search engine for women. Jimmy clapped enthusiastically as we continued the pitch, while Katy did her best to smile and nod just like she was told to.
Zola was finishing off her part of the presentation when the door of the conference room opened. She paused briefly as a tall, immaculately dressed man entered. I felt Katy grip my hand, and I smiled.
‘It’s fine. It’s going well,’ I whispered.
‘Ahhh, finally my husband returns. Ladies, this is Travis. Travis, the Scottish girls who Jimmy brought over to pitch the new dating app, Ella, Zola and Katy.’
‘It’s very good to meet you all. I’m Travis Mason.’ He paused for a second, and I wasn’t sure if he was about to shake our hands or head back out of the room. After a few lingering seconds, he headed up to the back and sat beside his wife.
‘How was your trip?’ she murmured, straightening out his collar.
Katy whispered, ‘Oh my God,’ to Zola and me. We nudged her to keep quiet.
‘Please, continue,’ Jimmy said.
‘That was good timing. As we have pretty much wrapped up our Dicktionary Club presentation,’ I replied with a smile. ‘Thank you so much for your attention.’
The blinds opened again, letting the city light flood in, as the screen rose back into the ceiling.
Jimmy clapped once more, and I felt myself blush at his appreciation for our work.
‘Come on back up here. Good work.’
I felt a wave of relief pass through me, knowing at least that part was over, and turned to Katy, who had gone translucent.
‘Are you OK?’ I spoke through my smile, trying hard not to make it obvious.
‘No,’ she hissed back.
We all sat back at the table, and Jimmy turned to his sister and brother-in-law. ‘Questions?’
‘Yes, I have one. You ladies obviously know the Scottish dating scene very well,’ Fee began. ‘But what experience do you have of American men? How much crossover can we anticipate? I mean, different countries, perhaps different dating cultures .?.?.’
Katy tutted. ‘The same problems, I’m afraid, Fee.’
I laughed, nudging my friend to keep quiet.
