“Night, Finn,” he echoed, barely a whisper.
I should go.
“Thank you.” I cleared my throat. “For—you know. Tonight. It was…”Incredible. “I had a really good time.”
His smile looked strained at the corners, like it took real effort. “Yeah. Me too.”
There was nothing left to say, so I nodded, opened the door, and stepped across the threshold. Cool air rushed at me, carding through my sweat-damp hair. I didn’t look back, ribs cinched tight, as the door whispered shut behind me.
One foot in front of the other. Each step carried the hollow weight of thoughts that echoed on a loop.
Mistake.
Most alive I’ve ever felt.
Can’t ever happen again.
TWELVE
JESSE
A one-time lapse in judgment.
It was. I knew it was—knew that Finn was right.
But I’d still wanted him to stay.
The city glow sliced through a gap between the curtains and painted a stripe across the ceiling of my bedroom. Quiet. Too damn quiet. I’d showered right after he’d left, tried to wash away the heaviness, the bitter taste at the back of my throat. No luck.
I’d wanted him to fuckingstay. To forget about tomorrow and the fact that we couldn’t do this, the same way he’d made me forget there was a world outside.
Something snagged in my mind and I laughed—dry, halfway to a stupid sob, lying on my back under sheets that smelled like him, with just enough self-awareness to realize that I was acting like some movie character on the brink of madness. “I wouldn’t make you forget your day, Jesse.” That’s what Finn had said that very first night, a silken promise that could have tipped into cheesy territory but somehow hadn’t. “I’d make you forget your name and what year it is.”
Yeah. He’d delivered.
Fuck.
I rolled to my side and fumbled for my phone, squinting against the dim light of the lock screen. Close to one. He’d left, what, an hour ago? Minutes stretching like brittle rubber.
I had his number. I could text him.
But he’d left.
I pulled up Shane’s name instead, typed words without thinking and sent them.
Man, I fucked up.
He might be asleep—better if he was maybe, give me some time to come down, grapple for a few scant hours of rest. Except three little dots appeared, and then:
?
Funny—that just about summed it up. I inhaled, exhaled, and replied.
Finn was at the bar.
Shane’s response was immediate.
Tell me you didn’t.
