Oh.
“Just like this.” I tipped my head into the cool sheets and smiled up at him, liquid warmth pooling heavy in my stomach. “With you on top of me. Fuck me slow and good. If you want?”
“If I…?Finn.” The way he said my name, low and almost reverent, sparked like lightning under my skin. He leaned down and tangled a hand in my hair, so close that all detail blurred. “You’ve no fucking idea how—” He stopped, restarted. “I don’t think you really understand just how beautiful you are.”
He’d called me that before—but we’d been strangers then. Now it hit me differently, slid into the gaps between my ribs as though it wanted to take up permanent residence.
I swallowed. “No need to flatter me. I’m already in your bed, aren’t I?”
“That’s not why.” The words were rough, firm, segued straight into a kiss so thorough it made all thoughts fall away. When he pulled back, it was to mouth a path down my throat and chest, lingering for a sucking bite near my hip bone before he shoved at my jeans. I raised my hips so he could pull themdown along with my boxer briefs. Then he sat back on his haunches and just…looked.
I wasn’t shy about my body—knew what I looked like, knew I could get attention if I wanted it. I just couldn’t make them stay. But the way Jesse watched me sent heat creeping up my neck.
“A picture would last longer.” I tried for an easy grin and felt it tipping into shy.
“Actually, no. There’s research—taking pictures makes your brain lazy.” He reached out to lightly run his nails up the inside of my thigh. “It’s like, cool, tech’s got this, I can clock out.”
I huffed out a slightly breathy laugh. “So you’re just gonna stare?”
“While I’m allowed? Yeah. I want to remember this.” Something flickered across his face and was gone. “Now, you sure?—”
“Yes,” I interrupted.
His eyes creased in a smile. “Good.”
He shifted just far enough away to reach into the nightstand, rummaging blindly for lube and a box of condoms, already open. Which… Huh. From what I’d heard, most guys in a place like New York skipped them now, but Jesse hadn’t even questioned it that first night. Habit, maybe. A doctor’s mindset. The point was that if I hadn’t been at that bar tonight… Just—I wasn’t the first guy he’d brought home, and I wouldn’t be the last either. That was fine.
It had to be fine.
“Seems you’re well prepared for overnight guests.” I’d meant it as a joke, but something tender slid underneath, vulnerable. No way to take it back, not with the way his attention flicked to my face.
“Well. Job’s brutal, casual’s easy. If you ask me, better safe than sorry.” He hesitated, then reached out to cup the side of my face, thumb pressing into my cheek. “This isn’t casual.”
“I, um.” I stopped, started again. “I only just started on PrEP, what with…relationship, you know? Before. But it’s like—I haven’t even—just you. Since I got here.”
God, too much. Maybe? The way he stared at me made me feel hot all over.
“Say something?” I tried.
“Me neither,” he said, low and sincere. “Since I met you.”
Static crackled in my brain. I tugged him down, our mouths sliding together like the weight of an impossible promise. A minute slipped away or two, heat sliding through my bones. When he finally broke away, his eyes were dark and moss-soft, focused on me in a way that made me feel just a little like I was coming apart at the seams.
He shucked his jeans and briefs, no fanfare, as if he didn’t even notice how it made my breath catch. Strong thighs and smooth skin, his cock arching proudly. Jesus, yes. All mine. At least tonight, he was.
When he snicked open the cap to coat his fingers, it was with a smile that burned slow and hot. “Tell me if I’m going too fast, okay?”
“You won’t.” I shifted slightly for easier access and slid him a grin. “I may not be a pro, but you’ve got nimble fingers trained for efficiency.”
He propped himself up on one elbow, grazing my lower lip with his teeth. “I’m savoring, though.”
“There’s a difference between savoring and glacial.”
His laugh was a warm gust of air against my cheek. Then his first fingertip breached me, slick and deliberate. I relaxed into it, pulse skittering behind my ribs. He watched my face as if I was a language he was only just beginning to speak, his touch sliding deeper, curling and searching. Second finger, still so damn careful that it felt like buoyancy. Three. Pleasure sparkedand looped. I gripped the back of his neck and yanked him into a wet, open-mouthed kiss that made him groan.
“Good?” he rasped—as though he were the one being opened up, any sharp edges blurring into want.
“Yeah.” I rolled my hips. “Be better if you fuck me.”
