As if this movement has rendered him speechless, he parts his lips and nods. With this I reach down to tug his tie-dye top over his head. Then, before he tries to talk me out of it again, I unbutton his shorts. He raises himself enough so that I can pull them off with his boxers. And there he is.
I’ve gotten James Boatman naked. He’s right here in front of me. Not a stitch of clothing. Despite how serious I was just a moment ago, a flurry of amusement washes over me.
James smirks as he watches my face. “If you laugh right now, Felicity…”
I can’t help it. A whisper of a laugh escapes my lips as I smile across at him.
“It’s notthat. I’m not laughing atthat,” I say, nodding downwards. “It’s justthis. This whole thing. I’m in a bed with Gloatman and we’re both naked.”
James acts swiftly, placing a finger in the crook of my armpit making me squeal.
“I warned you,” he says, laughing too. “Trust you to get me naked and be the first girl to ever laugh at me.”
“I’m not laughing atyou. I’d never. It’s lovely. It’s perfect.”
Before he can tickle me again, I lean forwards, placing my lips on his. This time I take control, pushing his back against the headboard as I take him in my other hand, hot, smooth perfection. His body tenses as I deftly roll the condom on and position him where I want him.
As I slide onto him, he wraps his arms around me again, his tongue exploring my mouth, holding me still, as if he’s adjusting to the sensation. We move in the same way, breathing into each other, feeling our way across each other’s bodies. He keeps me steady, rocking me when I try to pick up the pace. He takes back control, his thumb circling my clit, raising the pressure again until I’m on the verge of climaxing for a second time. I collapse into him as the final waves of pleasure roll through me. I want to make him come too.
Luckily, he senses this, lifting me and spinning our bodies so that my back falls into the bed, the soft mattress absorbing me as James drives into me again, kissing me, my collarbone, my earlobes. He finds a new, harder rhythm.
He whispers my name, endearments, into my ears as his lips press into my neck, my shoulder. I wrap my legs around his waist, bite his bottom lip again. In my mind there’s nothing but him, this moment.
And when he comes, we kiss, slow and heavy until we’re both sleepy, him rolling onto his side, my legs entwined with his. He holds me like nobody has ever held me before. And then a creeping, negative thought forms in my mind, pulse slowed, breathing steady: he’s probably like this with other women too – intimate. But I allow myself to pretend it’s more than that. Just for tonight.
I make a promise to myself that tomorrow I won’t bother him, I won’t push for more, I won’t even bring this whole thing up.
A clean break. A fling. A work trip.
Chapter Twenty-Two
As the sun reaches through the thin blinds and fills the room with morning light, I instantly feel an uncomfortable sensation rush through me. Like the way you feel on the last day of your holiday when you have a flight to catch. This has hardly been a holiday; it’s been a nightmare really. What with being abandoned in Scotland with a man I hated. And yet, there’s an unmistakeable heaviness in my core as if I’m saying goodbye to something.
Today I return to my reality.
I roll onto my front and turn my head to find the space beside me empty. I can hear the low hum of the power shower down the hall. Seizing the moment, I roll out of bed, pulling my clothes on before he comes back. I make the bed and sit there anxiously, scrolling through the TV channels.
I’m restless. I’m ashamed of the feeling but I’m dying to get my phone back. To be reconnected to the world. I want to talk to my parents, check my emails. James offered me his phone to use, but I don’t know either Mum’s or Dad’s numbers by heart. Why would I? They’re in my phone.
There’s also a familiar dull ache between my legs, reminding me of last night. I take a deep breath as footsteps approach the door. James comes in fully dressed. Thank god for that. No more nudity between us. Colleagues again now. That’s for the best.
He grins shyly when he sees me. His damp hair has been combed back with his fingers, almost like normal.
“The water is still hot if you wanted a shower,” he offers.
“Yeah,” I say, hopping off the bed and walking round to the door to grab my towel hanging on the hook.
As I open the door James says, “Felicity?”
I pause. “Hmm?”
“We ok?” His face is one of concern as he squeezes the back of his neck.
“Of course. That’s the plan, right?”
He frowns, nods. “Yeah.”
And with that I shoot out of the room and down the corridor, banishing the heaviness forming across my abdomen. A pressure that’s warning something bad is happening, or that something bad might happen yet.
