He places his spare hand on the wall beside me for balance as his other hand curves further behind my head, tipping it up gently. I realise what he’s doing. He’s trying to progress this kiss. He wants us to use tongues. And hell, I’m up for it. I’m clenching my core as shivers fly up and down my spine like one of those drop towers at an amusement park.
But, no, no, no, no… This cannot be.
This is madness. We must stop. We must.
His tongue traces the crease of my lips, inviting me to open for him, and that’s it. I laugh. I laugh against his lips whilst he’s still kissing me.
Oh, shit. This isn’t going to land well. I’m fairly certain it’s a rule you can’t laugh when someone tries to kiss you – same goes for laughing during sex.
James stops what he’s doing, slowly extracting himself from me. He takes a few steps back as my laughter grows harder. I cover my face to hide it, but the damage is already done, I see it written all over his face.
“I’m sorry,” I squeak.
“Oh, no. No. Go ahead and destroy my ego. I know it’s one of your favourite pastimes.” James’ tone is jokey, softer than usual, as if I have, in fact, destroyed his ego. Oh, well, it has always been a life goal of mine. I never thought it would be this easy to achieve though.
“No, no. It’s not you. Well, it is you. It’s just…This…” I gesture between us. “What?Why? How? No… We can’t. Can we? Oh god, this is weird. I hate you. But I sort of like you too,” I say. “Can’t believe I’m even saying this out loud.”
“You’re making zero sense, Felicity,” he says, rubbing his chin.
“Ok, sorry, what I mean is…” I laugh again. Christ my cheeks are hot. So are my thighs.Get a grip, Fliss. I sigh, calming myself. After a few deep breaths I say, “Do you think this is just a reaction to this situation?” I’m overusing hand gestures. I link my fingers together behind my back to hide them. “It’s so intense, this forced proximity, the last-two-people-in-the-world thing. Have we just succumbed to our baser desires?”
James blinks. He cups his cheeks as he blows out a breath. Then he laughs too. “Oh god, that’s it, isn’t it?”
“See.”
“Argh, this is embarrassing. So, you weren’t laughing at the kiss, then?”
Oh, man. I’ve really bruised his ego. His self-conscious thoughts are manifesting both verbally and as worried facial expressions. Who knew he had them? “Oh, well. No. It’s the situation.”
“Right,” he nods, looking around like he’s lost and just found himself in a ruined castle in Scotland. How did he get here? How didIget here? Oh, yes. Our crazy boss. “I’m sorry. If you weren’t into it, if I overstepped.”
A wild buzz spreads through my limbs and cheeks. “No, not at all, that’s sort of why I laughed.”
“No?” He frowns. “You’re still not making any sense.”
“No, as in I was dangerously into it… But you’re James Boatman. You’re the worst person I know. You’re a bloody nightmare. I can’t kiss you. You can’t kiss me. That’s not a thing we can do.”
He nods. “Dangerously into it?”
I laugh. “Why is that the only thing you heard?”
“Hmm, only bit that mattered, really.” He swallows, his face suddenly serious again. He reverts back to his Austen hero stance, as if he walked straight here from a seventeenth-century battle and is surprised to find his hunting lodge has burnt down in flames. With a light feathering of stubble on his chin and his hair falling around his ears, it’s almost believable. Unfortunately, his black t-shirt and walking trousers tarnish the image.
“What about you?” I say, my voice low. I suddenly realise that I’m scared of his answer. I’ve put myself into the more vulnerable position. He knows exactly what I’m thinking but as usual his thoughts remain enigmatic.
He steps closer to me where I’m leaning against the wall, until his body is once again flush with mine. I have to tip my head back to look at him which means my body arches into his.Wanton wench!James’ breathing isn’t normal. It’s choppy, harsh to the ear. His eyes lock with mine, blue fire sending shockwaves to my core.
“I think I’m dangerously into this too,” he says, as his knee slides between my legs, his thigh pressing against me. I gasp as he leans in closer.
This time his lips only trace mine. It’s so gentle, so subtle, I barely even feel it. His minty breath plays on my senses as his hand finds its way back to my cheek, fingers tickling my skin so gently I squirm as sensations burst then explode outwards like mini fireworks.
He comes back again, gently. Taking his time. His lips press on mine as if I’m made of sugar paper and might rip if he’s too hard.
I think I know exactly what he’s doing. He’s playing with me. He’s daring me to kiss him back. And I’m completely up for winning the game he’s started. But I’m not sure what the winning response is… Maybe I should pull away. That doesn’t feel right. Instead, I grab at his top, the material bunching in my grip. I finally get my hands in his hair, tugging his face closer to mine. Dear lord, it’s better than I’d imagined. His hair is long enough, soft enough, that I can properly weave it in between my fingers. I groan into his mouth as we both open to take it further.
His tongue collides with mine in this big hot mess. He holds me tighter, his spare hand roaming down the side of my body, finding my shoulders, my waist, then curving over my butt and pulling me into him.
We kiss harder, longer, desperately. It’s quite literally the sort of kiss you’d expect from two people who are as horny as hell, going at it at the end of the world. That’s when I take hold of James’ bottom lip with my teeth, nipping and pulling it into my mouth. I feel something hard bridge between us and James grunts in this guttural way before pushing off me. I release him, wondering if I’ve gone too far.
