Later, once I’d promised Arden I’d keep her updated on all things crush-related and listened to a ten-minute rant about her mother’s pushiness about wedding plans, Phoebe returned with a huge smile on her face, and a box of leftovers for me.
“It was so good,” she shouted from the bathroom as I practically unhinged my jaw to eat half of the still-warm burger in one bite. “I couldn’t decide between the burger and the chicken and waffles, so Dex let me get both. The chicken and waffles wereamazing, but that might be the best burger I’ve ever had in my life. I was like, ‘We have to get Vi one.’ And Dex was like, ‘Yeah.’?”
I moaned into the burger. Phoebe emerged from the bathroom, hair pinned out of her face, now wearing her swimsuit with a pair of shorts.
“Right?” she said, beaming. “Dex said maybe we could go back for breakfast before we leave tomorrow. Or will you still be avoiding him then?”
I took my time chewing another bite, studying a loose thread in the carpet intently. “I’m not avoiding him,” I said. I didn’t need to look at her to know she rolled her eyes. “We should get breakfast tomorrow. And maybe we should consider moving to Nebraska, home of the best fucking burger I’ve ever eaten in my life.”
She giggled and plunked down on the edge of the bed beside me, swiping a fry from the box in my lap. “We were gonna get ice cream, too, but we were so full, we couldn’t. Maybe tomorrow.”
“Maybe.” Phoebe pulled her phone out of her pocket, her smile widening as she looked at the screen. I polished off my burger, anticipating her next giggle before it happened. “What are you laughing at?”
She set her phone down and looked at me, eyes bright, cheeks rosy from the sun and probably how hard she was smiling. “Dex let me join one of Sequest’s Discord servers. And it’s Sequest, so it’s legit. No weirdos. They have a bunch of them for different demographics or whatever. This one is for fourteen- and fifteen-year-olds. It’s basically just a bunch of gay kids sending memes to each other and ranting about how shitty school is. It’s awesome.”
“That’s…” I swallowed hard. “That is awesome.”
“There’s this one girl, Mae. Her mom died a week after Dad.She’s so cool and we like a lot of the same music, except she’s super into screamo, which is like…” She rolled her eyes, pulling a face. “But anyway, she wants to hang out when we get back home. Do you think I could? Dex knows her, so she’s for sure not a creep.”
“Yeah.” I blinked hard and forced a smile. “Of course you can.”
“Yeah?” Her eyes lit up.Everythinglit up. “Oh my god, I can’t wait. Maybe she could sleep over soon-ish?” She hesitated, scrunching up her nose. “I’d have to fix my room first. It’s still full of boxes.”
She was sprinting toward that new normal everyone told us would arrive and it knocked the wind from my lungs. I’d nearly given up on hoping for better days, let alone that Phoebe would choose to share them with me.
“First thing,” I said, emotion swelling in my throat. “First thing when we get back, we’ll fix up your room. We can even paint, if you want.”
She leaned her shoulder into mine. “Thanks, Vi,” she said and stole another fry. “Wanna go swimming? The pool here is so nice. You can just sit on the edge if you want to wait the thirty minutes after eating. I know you’re weird about that.”
“It’s not weird. It’s science.”
“It’s an urban legend.” She swiped yet another fry and hopped to her feet. “Come on.”
“Okay,” I said. “I have to get changed. I’ll meet you there.”
She offered a little salute and left. The moment the door shut behind her, I shut my eyes and focused on my breathing so I wouldn’t cry. Then I got up, got dressed, and went down the hall to Dex’s room.
“I saw you buy those fucking floaties at the gas station,” he was saying as he opened the door. “So, no, I don’t want to—” His mouth snapped shut at the sight of me, eyes widening.
And I couldn’t say anything, so I stepped forward and wrapped my arms around him in a crushing hug.
He didn’t stiffen, like I thought he might. Didn’t push me away gently and tell me it was a bad idea for us to be this close. Once the bolt of shock passed, his hand found my back, rubbing soft circles between my shoulder blades.
“Vi,” he murmured.
“Thank you,” I said into his shirt. “Phoebe told me what you did. She’s making friends, and she’s making plans. Things to look forward to when the trip is done. You have no idea, Dex. You have no idea.”
His other hand cradled the back of my head and I squeezed my eyes shut, pretending just for a moment that I’d get to be held like this by him every day.
“I should’ve mentioned it to you first. I was going to.”
I forced myself to step away, swallowing hard as his hands fell to his sides. His eyes swept over my face, full of some emotion I couldn’t quite read. “I get it. You knew I’d be okay with it, especially after I told you how I feel about moving her to Boston.”
“She likes Boston. She just needs a community of kids her own age, away from school.”
“I should’ve thought of that.” I rubbed my eyes. “I should’ve taken her to the YMCA or something.”
He made a face. “She wouldn’t do that.”
