“Sorry, can you give me a minute? Family stuff.” I grimace at Micah, who nods without hesitation. He steps back to give me enough room so I can squeeze past him toward the stairs.
Just before I can slip away, his fingers close around my wrist to stop me. “Holler if you need me. I'll be right here.” Micah nods over at the couch.
I mouth a silent“Thank you”and then press the phone back against my ear, hurrying up the steps and closing the door to my room behind me.
“What do you mean, they need me? How bad?” A wave of guilt washes over me. I should have listened more closely when my mom called. Should have asked more questions. I should have reached out to my sisters and checked in more thoroughly about the harvest.
But in the last few days, I was just so busy and—no. I was selfish because I was having fun. I could have shot them a text. I pace up and down in front of my bed, chewing on my lower lip.
“It's not the apocalypse,” Pen says, but continues right away. “The cherries are ready for harvesting already, not to mention the cows need more attention because of all this heat, and we had trouble finding extra hands lately, so yeah, Dad's been doing it all by himself. I don’t want him to burn out.” Her voice is so thick with brimming tears that I have to clear my throat in sympathy.
“Jesus, of course he is,” I huff, finally sinking down on my bed, pushing my head into my free hand. It's not that I can't go; myparents' farm is only a few hours away. It’d only take a day of getting ready and driving there. I can finish my summer courses online; it's just the most recent developments that I'll have to give up.
Getting laid is a lot less important than my father's health, though.
“Alright, I…I can be there in two days. Can you hold out until then?”
“Of course, Lind. Thank you,” Aspen says gently.
I huff out half a laugh and shake my head. “C’mon, did you seriously think I'd say no?”
“I know how stubborn you can be.”
“Oh yeah,I'mthe stubborn one in the family.”
“Duh! All Woodrow men are as stubborn as mules while the women—”
“Ma-ma story?” a small voice pipes up, and instantly my sister's attention shifts.
“Aw, sweetie, where's your dad? Did you put him to sleep again?”
“Is that my favorite niece?” I smile, even if this isn't a video call.
“Say goodnight to Uncle Linden, and then it's truly bedtime!” Aspen sounds exasperated, but still so fond as she deals with her daughter.
“Night-night!” the tiny voice obediently babbles into the phone, making me melt.
“Goodnight, little one! Night, Pen.”
I wait until the slight fumbling and quiet talking at the other end stops before also hanging up, then let myself fall backward onto my bed, sliding the phone under my pillow.
“Fuck,” I tell the ceiling.
“Is everything alright?”
I startle when a voice cuts through my swirling thoughts about what I'll need to pack, any tips I can give Olli so he’ll be fine handling the kittens on his own, what I'll tell Barb at the pound, hoping that she can spare me for a few weeks. Of course I hadn't told Aspen that: it wouldn't change anything. If our parents need me, I'll go.
I slowly push myself into a sitting position, squinting over to where Micah is standing in the doorframe. He hesitates for a moment, then steps into my room.
“Yeah.” I sigh, raising my shoulders. “Yeah it…” The words get stuck in my throat no matter how much I want to get them out. Finally, I shake my head.
I can hear the muffled sound of feet on the carpet as Micah crosses the room, feel the mattress dip as he sits down next to me, but I don’t turn my head. Instead, I look at my hands.
“No.” I finally breathe out the truth. “No, it's not. Everyone’s fine, but—” I pause, taking several deep breaths. “They need me to help with the farm. They’re overwhelmed with the harvest this year.” It’s not my family’s fault, and I don’t resent my sister for telling me what’s really going on when my mom wanted to shield me from it.
No, I’m resentful of all the other students who get to have a proper summer break. Who don’t have to get up hours before their classes to take care of cows.
“Oh. But I’m glad your family’s okay,” Micah says tentatively.
