I take a deep breath and slide onto the bed beside her, gathering her into my arms instead of positioning myself between her thighs like every instinct is screaming for me to do.
“Rowan?”
I press my face into her hair, breathing her in. “You should have told me. You deserve something better than me just pouncing on you after being gone for five weeks. I don’t know if I should be the one to?—”
“Don’t,” she interrupts, lifting her head to look me in the eye. “Don’t you dare say it. I could have been with someone else, but I didn’t want to be. I chose to wait, and now I know thatyouare the one I was waiting for.”
I search her face, looking for any hint of uncertainty. All I see is the strongest, bravest woman I’ve ever known. I love her so goddamn much.
“I don’t want you to regret it, Violet.”
Her voice is thick with emotion, but her conviction holds firm as she says, “You’re the only thing I could never regret.”
God. She means it. Every word.
I capture her lips in a fierce kiss. “I’ll try to be gentle. You can tell me to stop at any point, okay?”
She nods, chest rising and falling with quick breaths. “I… I’m on birth control.”
I shake my head. “Doesn’t matter. I’m clean, but we’re not taking any chances with your safety the first time, okay?”
She gives me a nervous smile. “Okay.”
I reach for the bedside drawer, fumbling for a condom. My hands shake slightly as I tear open the packet, rolling it on while she watches with wide, trusting eyes.
Gently, I guide her onto her back, and her legs fall open just enough for me to settle between them.
I press a hand to her hip. “I love you, Violet. So goddamn much.”
“I love you, too,” she whispers.
I lower my mouth to hers, kissing her soft and slow while my hand slides between her thighs. She’s soaked, her body trembling beneath my touch as I circle my thumb over her clit. Her hips buck against my hand, seeking more pressure.
“Easy,” I murmur against her lips.
I slide one finger inside her, moving slowly and giving her time to adjust. Her breath hitches, her eyes fluttering closed as I add a second finger, stretching her gently.
“That’s it,” I whisper, pressing kisses along her jaw and down her throat. “You’re doing so good.”
Her hands clutch my shoulders as I work my fingers deeper, curling them to find that spot that makes her gasp. When I find it, her back arches off the bed, a broken moan escaping her lips.
I withdraw my fingers and position myself at her entrance, the head of my cock pressing against her slick heat. “Tell me if I hurt you. Promise me.”
She nods, her fingers threading through my hair. I push in slowly, reveling in the way she tenses around me. She’s so fucking tight, gripping me like a vise, and I have to grit my teeth against the urge to drive all the way in.
“Breathe, baby,” I whisper, watching her face for any sign of discomfort.
Every instinct in my body is screaming at me to claim her, to bury myself to the hilt, to make her mine in every way possible. But this is Violet. My Violet. I’d rather die than hurt her.
She winces, and I freeze immediately. “Are you okay?”
“Mmhmm.” She nods. “Don’t stop.”
I push forward with aching slowness. I’ve never felt anything like this in my life. Her body takes me perfectly, inch by inch. I finally drive forward with one last careful thrust. Her fingernails dig into my shoulders, a small cry escaping her lips. I still completely, buried to the hilt. Her chest rises and falls rapidly beneath mine, her eyes wide.
“Are you okay?” I ask, my voice strained from the effort of holding back.
“It’s…a lot,” she whispers. “But good. Really good.”
