It took several minutes before his pulse began to slow. Untangling his legs, he swung them over the side of the bed and pushed himself upright. The cool air of the room prickled over his sweat-damp skin, raising goose bumps in its wake.
The bathroom light was too bright when he flicked it on, and he squinted his eyes, avoiding looking at himself in the mirror. He cranked the shower on hot and stepped under the spray. The water pummeled his shoulders, washing away the sweat and the phantom splinters, but it couldn’t erase the sound.
That whiz followed by that thud. Over and over, inches from ending him.
He leaned his forehead against the tile, letting the heat of the water soak into him, willing it to drown out the nightmare. But it wasn’t just the gunfight that haunted him—it was her. Tess. His mind had dragged her into the line of fire, had painted her in blood when she should’ve been nowhere near that warehouse.
It rattled him more than the bullets had.
He closed his eyes and lifted his face into the spray. He didn’t know what terrified him more—the memory of almost dying, or the thought that he cared about Tess enough for his nightmares to put her in the crosshairs.
For those brief moments when he'd kissed her the other night, she'd made him feel alive, and now his subconscious had turned that into a threat. It was proof of how easily she could slip under his guard and make him question the rule he'd lived by for years—keep things casual. And yet, even after the nightmare, after all the reasons he gave himself to keep his distance, he still wanted her.
He tried to push her out of his mind, but the only other option was to replay the shooting. His thoughts ping-ponged between the two, refusing to let anything else in, so he settled on Tess. For all the risk she posed to his carefully ordered life, she was easier to face than the echo of gunfire chasing him through the dark.
This time, in his mind, he didn't pull away. He let the kiss linger, imagined drawing her into his arms instead of apologizing and walking out the door. Before the day could intrude or either of them could second-guess what was happening, he simply held her close, content to remain there as long as she'd let him.
The thought should have sent him running.
Instead, it followed him back to sleep.
Chapter Twelve
Saturday morning, Tess sat at the dining table with a cup of cappuccino while scrolling through her Instagram feed. Several of her friends had posted images of themselves with their growing families. She was one of the few who hadn’t gotten married or had children yet. While she refused to settle and knew dating was out until Andy was at least in college, she couldn’t help but be a little jealous. She wanted the kind of relationship her parents had lived—one that was loving and caring. The couple had taken great pleasure in doing little things for each other. Her mom used to bake one of her dad’s favorite desserts every week, and he would take his wife’s car to top off the gas even though it was three-quarters full. There were many other things they did just because they were in love and wanted to provide for each other and their children.
Sighing, she set her phone aside and grabbed a pen and pad from her purse to make a list. Since Andy was at Dan’s hardware store for his first shift, Tess had most of the day to herself. She was waiting for an email with an estimate from the last potential contractor so she could decide which of the three to hire to fix the house, and then she needed to hit the supermarket for a few things. The first two contractors had been reasonable, most likely since Frank Carbone was present for the evaluations and scrutinized every item and cost that they listed. Both estimates were within the same range as the insurance payout. However, one contractor was able to start the job two weeks earlier than the other one, which was a no-brainer for Tess. If the third contractor was under budget and could begin next week, Tess would have to recheck the reviews for both companies before making a final decision.
It had been a busy week between work, picking up a few more things that she’d forgotten at the house, and driving Andy back and forth to school. On top of all that, she couldn’t stop thinking about the kiss she shared with Brian and then his rejection afterward. It shouldn’t bother her so much—mixing business with pleasure is never a good thing—but it did.
She hadn’t seen or heard from him since then, yet he slipped into her thoughts more often than she wanted to admit. More than once, she’d picked up her phone, tempted to thank him again for letting them stay at the beach house—or maybe just to hear his voice—but each time she stopped short, afraid she wouldn’t find the right words. The last thing she wanted was for him to think she expected more from him... even though that kiss had been the hottest of her life.
As she jotted a few things down on the pad, a loud banging came from the back porch. Frowning, she stood, crossed over to the back door, and peeked out the small window in it. Brian Malone had his back to her while working on the loose railing, and she couldn’t help but admire his masculine form. Wearing faded jeans that fit perfectly and a taut T-shirt, showing off his muscular shoulders and arms, he looked yummy enough to eat. It took a few moments for Tess to realize she was nearly drooling as she stared at the man. She completely forgot he promised to come over today to fix the railing.
Why hadn’t he knocked on the door to say hello before he started working? He would’ve walked right by her car in the driveway, so he knew she was home. Did he not want to talk to her? She guessed so since he’d practically sprinted out of the house the other night.
Sighing, she was about to ignore him and return to her list-making when he glanced over his shoulder and their gazes met. For a heartbeat, something hot flared in his eyes before he shuttered it again, leaving her to wonder if she’d imagined it.
After a moment, he gestured for her to join him on the porch. She hesitated before opening the door and stepping outside.
“Hi,” he said. “I hope I didn’t bother you with the noise.
If he could play casual and indifferent, so could she. “Nope, not at all. I was just making a list of things I need from the store.”
“Oh.” He tapped the railing. “I’m off today, so I wanted to get this fixed.”
She cocked her head to the side. “You told me the other day you’d be here.”
“I did say that, didn’t I?”
Tess didn’t respond to what she assumed was a rhetorical question. She was too busy fighting the urge to demand he kiss her again and wondering what was going on in his head. He wasn’t the smiling, easygoing guy she’d known until the other night, and she had the feeling there was more to the change in his demeanor than that damn kiss.
Pushing down the sting of his rejection the other night, she stepped forward and placed a hand on his arm, startling him. His wide, caramel-colored eyes lifted to meet hers, and she gave him a concerned smile. “Are you okay?”
His nod quickly morphed into a shake of his head. He stared at the ocean for a few moments before responding. “Can we go for a walk?”
She didn’t hesitate because his unease drew her to him. Something troubling was on his mind, and she couldn’t stop wanting to help him work through whatever it was.
“Sure. Let me get my cell phone and keys and lock up.”
