Three nights passed before I saw Kai again.In fact, he had already arrived - and was already swimming - when I got home from work.Later than usual, and preoccupied by the tall glass of wine I was more than ready to treat myself to.As I walked through the kitchen I could see his body moving through the water, softly illuminated by the garden lights.
Sliding open the patio doors, I stepped out onto the deck.
“Evening,” I called out.Kai had just reached the far end of the pool, but caught himself before pushing off again.
“Good evening!”he replied, brushing water from his face before shaking his head.I grinned at the sight of the droplets flying, haphazardly, around him.“Are you only just home from work?”
I nodded, wearily.“It’s been one of those days,” I told him.“Do you want a drink?”
Even from this distance I could see him roll his eyes.“No, thanks.And you shouldn’t either.Come do some laps with me.”
I considered the bottle of wine in the fridge.How cool it would be, how crisp.Just the right balance of dryness and sweetness.The perfect end to a frustrating day with an asshole boss.
Kai could clearly see me wavering.“Look, just do twelve laps and then you can have the drink if you still want to.I promise you’ll feel so much better.”
I felt faintly absurd, being coaxed into exercising, but I also knew that Kai wouldn’t quit until I gave in.
“Fine,” I conceded.“But only twelve.”
He held up his hands in acquiescence.“Deal!”
I turned to walk back into the house, figuring I’d get my shorts from upstairs, but his voice stopped me.
“Did you buy something that would be actually decent to swim in?”
I cringed, inwardly.The bag was still sitting on the table; I’d almost managed to forget about the whole idea.Kai, apparently, had not.
“I’m just going to get my shorts,” I told him, trying to keep my tone airy.I could hear him swimming over to the closer side of the pool.
“Tate, you promised,” he complained.
I sighed.Turned around.His face wore an expression of disappointment that left him looking much younger.Like a teen, told he can’t have a drink or borrow his dad’s car.
“Okay, I bought some,” I admitted, unable to resist that doleful expression.“But I haven’t had a chance to try them on to see if they fit yet, so I’m just going to stick with the shorts.”
Kai shook his head.“Try them on now.If they don’t fit, you can take them back.If they do, it’s going to be so much better for doing laps.I really don’t want you to get disillusioned on day one.”
I stared at him.He stared back, impatient.
“Fine,” I conceded, picking up the bag off the table.“I’ll go try them on.”
“Oh come on, Tate, stop wasting time,” Kai scolded.“Just put them on now so you can get in the water, do some laps, and then have that drink I know you’ve been daydreaming about since noon.”
I chuckled, despite everything.“Noon?More like since 8 am.”
He smiled at me.“See?So the sooner you get in, the sooner you can get out again.Show me what you bought.”
I reached into the bag and, wincing inwardly, pulled out the swimsuit.At the time it had seemed the most conservative and least likely to grab attention of all the options on the rack, a dark gray that caught the halogens in the kitchen with a slight shimmer.Awkwardly, I held it up for Kai to see.
“Perfect,” he decided.“Put them on and get in here.”
My stomach roiled.Insisting on going upstairs to get changed, or just into the downstairs bathroom, would look odd.Yet the idea of undressing in front of Kai - even if he was across the deck in the pool, and I was inside the house - felt charged in a way that was hopelessly unnerving.
Frustrated and self-conscious, I yanked off the tags; realized, a moment too late, that now there was no way of returning it, if the suit didn’t fit properly.Set the scrap of glistening fabric down on the table as I pulled off my jacket and then unbuttoned my shirt.My body half-turned in the process; I knew I was subconsciously trying to present as small a profile to him as I could.As though that might make me invisible, or as good as.
Then my belt, and then my pants, pushing off my socks as I went.Standing, feeling out of place in nothing but black boxer-briefs and knowing that, if I turned my head just a little, I’d be able to see Kai looking back at me.
The thought of it was sending waves of uncertainty through my body.On the one hand, I felt so self-conscious that I could be sick.On the other, though, the heat of his gaze was sending shivers through my crotch.The idea of getting hard, in such an obvious way, was mortifying, but I knew that if I carried on over-thinking things it was a real - and really terrible - possibility.
