‘Hey, get your own!’
On her other side, while she’s scolding Amit, Raju swoops in and takes another bite of her pretzel. It’s pure cinema watching Shirin’s pretzel disappear in front of her eyes, the boys taking turns pecking away at it.
Fortunately, the boys are nice enough to get Shirin a replacement pretzel once they’ve demolished the original. Though I think that was more for their benefit than hers, since they buy one for themselves, too.
As we’re munching away, Shirin asks me about work.
‘Yeah, how’s that going? You’ve been quiet on the chat,’ Amit notes as he chomps on his sesame-seed pretzel.
With the prank wars, my mind’s been more occupied with ways to upstage Salman than with the group chat. I relay what’s been going on this week, my voice becoming more and more animated as I describe the pranks in great detail. I feel myself smile as I recall how goofy Salman looked when he saw the picture of the scary cupid on his desk, and when I re-enact how I ran from my desk to the kitchen once I’d got a taste of the hot sauce cupcake. I expect the girls to laugh with me but they don’t,and it worries me.
‘What?’ I say when I notice Shirin and Lipi giving each other looks, while the boys look down at their pretzels as if they hold the answer to the universe. ‘Did I say something wrong? Were any of my pranks offensive?’
‘No, not at all,’ Lipi assures me.
‘Then what is it?’
Lipi twists her lips. ‘It’s just .?.?. you look happy talking about him.’
Oh.
‘I don’t think we’ve seen your eyes sparkle like this since before the break-up.’
‘They’re well lit up,’ Amit adds. ‘Like you’ve seen the light at the end of the tunnel or something.’
‘Well, I’m not happy talking abouthim,’ I clarify. ‘The situations are just funny. I don’t think anyone couldnotlaugh about what we’ve been up to.’
‘If that’s what you need to tell yourself, sure,’ Shirin says with a snort, ‘but you’re also doing that thing where whenever you say his name you look away for a second with a twitch of your lips. The way you used to when you were dating.’
‘I do not do that!’
‘You totally do,’ Shirin counters.
Shit, do I? I don’t want my feelings for Salman to show. Ican’thave them show. For the past six months I’ve done all I can to push them down, burying them so deep that there is no chance of them resurfacing, but it seems that they’re crawling up quicker than I can shovel the dirt back on them.
‘Guys, come on,’ Amit says, looking sternly at Shirin and Lipi like they’ve done something wrong. ‘We said we wouldn’t get involved.’
‘Salman’s the same, by the way,’ Shirin adds. ‘When he talks about you, his cheeks must hurt from all that cheesing he does.’
I feel my heart slow. ‘He talks about me?’
‘Shirin,’ Amit scolds.
‘What? She asked!’
‘No, she didn’t,’ Raju says.
‘I guess, but that’s when there was nothing for hertoknow,’ Shirin contends.
‘None of our business still,’ Amit maintains. ‘Anything they need to discuss, they can do themselves. We don’t need to –’
‘Dude, it’s not like I’m telling her to get back with him, I just think she deserves all the info –’
‘Nah, come on, that’s not it and you know it –’
‘Actually, no, I don’t –’
‘Can someone please just tell me what he said?’ I interrupt. My heart is beating so fast I can hardly breathe. I don’t want to open Pandora’s box, but how can I not? On the one hand, nothing good can come from knowing what he’s been saying about me, but on the other .?.?. I need to know if it’s all in my head. If his behaviour in the office has been a charade to keep me on his good side while we work together – or if there really is something between us.
