“Ava.” His voice was ragged. “This isn’t about the list.”
“I know.”
“This is about you and me. Just us.”
My heart stuttered. “Liam?—”
He pushed inside me in one slow, devastating stroke, and we both stopped breathing. He filled me completely, perfectly, and for a moment neither of us moved. His forehead dropped to mine, his breath shaking against my lips.
“Fuck,” he whispered. “You feel like everything I never let myself want.” His gaze locked with mine. “I want you so much it scares me, but not enough to stop.”
“Don’t stop. Please.” I held on to him tighter, and it felt like my heart was in my throat. I knew what Liam thought about himself, but I was in too deep. If he stopped himself now from really being in this with me, I’d be devastated.
He held me tight as he repositioned us, laying me down on our pile of clothes, and then started to move, slow and deep, and I clung to him as sensation built in waves. This wasn’t the frantic pace we’d set in the library archives. This wasn’t the controlled dominance of our bondage night. This wasn’t like any sex I’d ever had, and based on the look of awe on Liam’s face, I didn’t think it was anything he’d had either.
It felt an awful lot like how I’d always imagined making love would be.
Each thrust hit that spot inside me that made stars burst behind my eyes. His hands gripped my thighs, holding me open for him, and I felt completely undone by the way he was looking at me.
Like I was his.
Like he wasmine.
“I can’t stop wanting you,” he said between kisses. “Every second of every day. Even when I tried to stay away, you were all I could think about.”
I pulled him closer, needing him deeper, needing to be consumed by this feeling before my rational mind couldcatch up and remind me of all the reasons this was dangerous—for my heart more than anything else.
“Don’t stay away,” I breathed. “Don’t?—”
He silenced me with his mouth, swallowing my words as his hips picked up speed. The pleasure was building now, coiling tight in my belly, and I knew I was close. He knew it too—he always knew—and his hand slipped between us to circle my clit in time with his thrusts.
“I’ve got you, Aves. I’m not going anywhere. Let go for me, Sunshine. Let me feel you.”
With two more thrusts, I shattered with his name on my lips, my body clenching around him as wave after wave of pleasure crashed through me. He followed seconds later, burying himself deep and groaning against my neck as he came.
We stayed like that for a long time, tangled together, our hearts racing in sync. He rolled us over, so my body was slack on top of his.
“I meant what I said,” he said quietly, pulling me tighter against his chest. “By the river. I’m done pretending.”
I wanted to believe him. God, I wanted it so badly. But I knew Liam. I knew his hang-ups about commitment, and hope could be a very dangerous thing.
“Liam…”
“I know.” He pressed a kiss to my hair. “I know I’m not exactly a safe bet. But I’m tired of hiding. I don’t want to sneak around anymore. I don’t want to pretend I’m not crazy about you every time we’re around other people. I want to hold your hand in public and take you on real dates.”
My heart was pounding so hard I could hear it. “What are you saying?”
“I’m saying I want this to be real.” He tilted my chin up,making me meet his eyes. “I want to tell Drew. I want to stop lying to everyone. I want—” He swallowed hard. “I want to be with you. For real.”
I searched his face for any sign of hesitation, any indication that he’d wake up tomorrow and change his mind. But all I saw was the same fear I felt—the fear of wanting something this much, of risking everything for something that might not last.
“You know what telling Drew means,” I said carefully. “He might not forgive you. This could ruin your friendship.”
“I know.”
“And you’re still sure?”
He kissed me softly. “I’ve never been more sure of anything.”
