He leaned back casually like he’d sat in my room at my desk a hundred times before and this was just another night even though this was only the third time he’d been in my room. The first was when he helped me move in. The second was when he carried me home.
“I trust you to not get attached. I can’t be anything more than a friend helping you check off this list. But I don’t want you to do it with anyone else. I saw what Chris put you through. I saw how hurt you were. You deserve better than that. You deserve to be treated like a fucking queen. You deserve to know that you are the most beautiful woman in any room you walk in. You deserve to feel pleasure that makes your toes curl.”
He pointed to his chest. “I can give you that.”
It was suddenly hard to breathe. How could he say all of that and think emotions wouldn’t get involved? You didn’t say those things to a fuck buddy.
“I’m scared I can’t keep my feelings out of it,” I admittedto him, knowing full well this might be the nail in my coffin and it could be years before I ever found another guy who’d check off this list with me. But I did trust him and I wasn’t going to lie to him.
“I’ve never done anything like this. I’m a relationship girl, Liam. I always have been. And truthfully, I’m scared of what damage this might cause to us because I do trust you and you’ve been in my life for a long time. I don’t want to ruin anything.
“But I also have to admit that you’ve planted this seed in my head and I can’t stop thinking about it. Because you’re right. I do need someone I trust. And I do want to be the kind of person that goes after what she wants. And I want to check off this list. I don’t ever want a man to think I’m boring in bed again. Which is why, despite my reservations and the worry I have, I want to do this with you.”
He looked almost relieved. But then his face went neutral again.
I grabbed the notebook off my desk and started pacing again. “So if we’re going to do this, I need us to set up rules and boundaries so that there’s no chance of either of us getting hurt, but me especially since I’ve never done anything like this before. I think the first rule should be that we communicate with each other, and at any time we can say we’re done. Second, if it gets too complicated, we stop. Another one should probably be no sleepovers. We just spend time together to check off the list and that’s it. Nothing extra. I’m sure I’m forgetting something.” I ran my hand through my hair and glanced over at Liam only to find him grinning at me like he found me adorable.
The look in his eyes made my stomach swoop, but I chose to ignore it. “What?” I asked.
“Give me your list.”
“I—”
He cut me off. “Don’t make me ask again, Aves.”
I swallowed thickly. And then reluctantly handed him the notebook.
TEN
She handed me the list as if she was sealing her fate. I read through the list that I’d had burned into my brain since the first time I read it, and my dick responded accordingly, instantly getting hard in my pants. I fought the urge to stroke it, as my imagination went wild with all the ways we could check these items off.
I knew she was freaking out—even if I didn’t know her, the rambling show she just put on would’ve given her away—and I always wanted her to know that she was safe with me, no matter what. I handed the list back to her.
“Pick one thing you want to check off.”
Her eyes bulged. “Right now?”
I barely suppressed my chuckle.
I needed to find a way to get her out of her head and moving us forward. She wanted to be brave, but she needed to be pushed. So I stood up and walked over to her.
“What are you doing?” she asked, but she didn’t move away from me, and her body almost leaned toward me the closer I got.
“Breaking the ice,” I murmured, right before I sealed my lips over hers.
Stars exploded behind my eyes. Kissing her was more than I’d ever imagined. Her lips were soft, almost velvety, like rubbing a rose petal over your lips. Her body fit perfectly against mine, her soft curves nestled against my hard muscles. She moaned against me, the sound vibrating against my lips and making my dick turn to steel in my jeans. She melted against me as I deepened the kiss, sliding my tongue along the seam of her lips until they parted on a gasp and let me in. Her arms wrapped around my neck, while mine slid around her hips to her back, holding her tight against me as our tongues danced together like we’d done this a million times.
Fuck, she was perfect.
Her mouth was heaven.
I didn’t want to stop, but if I didn’t pull away now, I’d be lost to her forever. So I gently slowed our kiss and pulled away, watching her face.
Her eyes were still closed, her mouth slightly parted, her cheeks flushed rosy, and her lips slightly red and swollen.
Idid that.
I made her look like that.
