Aaric frowns.“Mmmm.I vaguely remember Vanguard having a son.What happened, honey?”
“When Presley bought me from my dad, Jeremy had joined the Army.He was away at boot camp.I guess Presley was lonely, and I suspect Jeremy had been taking care of a lot of things around the house.That’s why Presley purchased me.”
“Where was Presley’s wife?Jeremy’s mother?”
“She’d died several years before.”
Aaric nods.“Go on.”
“Jeremy came to the house after boot camp.He only had a few days’ leave before he went to war.”
Aaric’s face tightens.He licks his lips.“And you two had sex.”It’s not a question.
I nod, more tears falling.I’m so embarrassed.“I’m a harlot.My father called me a harlot, and he was right.”
Aaric shakes his head.“You’re not a harlot, Hannah.Never use that word again.People have sex.It’s normal human behavior.You meet someone, you have chemistry, and the two of you decide to get intimate.It’s not sinful.I don’t believe that, Hannah.”
I stare at him, my brow furrowed.
“What are you thinking, sunshine?”
“I’m not sunshine.You shouldn’t call me that.I’m a dark cloud.”
Aaric gasps.“You are not a darkanything.You’re everything light and good.You’ve had your head filled with nonsense.I’m going to tell you what a great person you are until you believe me.”
He’s lost his marbles.I shake my head again.“I had sex out of wedlock.”
“Honey, nearly everyone has sex before they get married.”
“It’s immoral.”
“I don’t believe that.”
I’m struggling to grasp why Aaric hasn’t shunned me and kicked me out of his home.
“No god is going to punish you for having sex, Hannah.I promise.Tell me what happened to Jeremy.Was he killed in combat?”
“Yes, and it’s my fault.”
“How could it be your fault, honey?You weren’t there.”
“I begged God to keep him away.I didn’t want him to come back.I pleaded with God every night that Jeremy would never return.And then he died.And it’s all my fault.”
Aaric’s face tightens again.“Honey… You are not responsible for Jeremy’s death.Not even a little bit.He died in a warzone.It has nothing to do with you.”
I turn my face into the pillow and cry while Aaric rubs my back some more.He doesn’t leave.He doesn’t even seem to blame me.I don’t know why.He should.I do.
When I can’t cry another tear, I return to sniffling and accept more tissues from Aaric.
“Why didn’t you want him to come back, Hannah?”he asks gently.
“Because I didn’t like what he did to me.It hurt.I didn’t want him to do it again,” I whisper.
“You mean when you had sex?”
I nod, not looking at him.I’m so embarrassed.People don’t talk about these things.
“If it was your first time, it was bound to hurt a bit, honey.That’s normal.Did he help you reach orgasm and make sure you were wet before he made love to you?”
