Chapter 8
Desmond
It was hours later, well past the worst of the surge, when I found her.
Something was drawing me to her. Something had lodged inside me andrefusedto move along.
What I was about to do wasn’tjustunethical. It was immoral, and it was downright wrong. If she hadn’t wedged so deeply into the recesses of my mind, I might have been able to make a clearer choice.
But I wasn’t.
And she was.
So I sought her out.
Not cornered — never that — but intercepted, a quiet inevitability rather than an ambush. She was charting in an alcove off the main hall, shoulders loose now, hair escaping its tie. The sight of her like that — unguarded — hit me harder than it should have.
“Anya,”
She looked up immediately. Too immediately. Like she'd been listening for my voice without meaning to. I didn't miss the way her lips ticked up, just a touch. Her first name rolled off my tongue like asong. It wasn’t something I was in the habit of — referring to my fellow doctors by their first name.
But hers was delicious. And… if her reaction — the slight gasp, the faintest blush on her cheeks — was any consolation, she wasn’t against it, either.
Was I projecting?
“Dr. Vaughn.”
I waited until a nurse passed, until the noise swelled and receded again. Then I stepped closer, just enough that the space between us felt deliberate. “I need a word,” I said. “Somewhere private.”
Her eyebrows lifted, but she nodded. No hesitation. That alone made something tight in my chest loosen and tighten all at once.
The on-call room was empty. I closed the door but didn't lock it. Ineverwould. As I leaned back against the counter, hands braced behind me like I were holding myself in place.
This was the part I hadn't rehearsed. The truth rarely benefited from polish. “I can't stop thinking about you,” I said plainly.
Her breath caught; I watched it happen. Filed it away like evidence.
“I've tried,” I continued, voice controlled. “I've told myself it's stress, proximity, adrenaline. That it'll pass.” My jaw tightened. “It hasn't. Not for a while.”
She didn't interrupt. Didn't pretend she didn't know where this was going.
“The way you listen to me, how you execute without asking,” I said. “You trust me. And I haven't been able to focus since.” A pause. Then, honest and rough around the edges, “That's a problem.”
Anya swallowed. “You're my attending; I’m supposed to listen to you,”
“You and I both know it’s more than that.” I pushed off the counter, took one measured step closer, then stopped. “Which is why this ends one of two ways. Either we keep pretending nothing's here, and I stay distracted. Or…” I exhaled. “We acknowledge it. Briefly. Cleanly.”
Her pulse jumped in her throat. I couldseeit. God help me, I wanted to touch it. “You're suggesting—” she started.
“I'm suggesting,” I said carefully, “that we get it out of our systems. One time. No promises. No expectations. So I can fucking focus again.”
Silence fell between us, thick and electric.
“This is entirely inappropriate,” her eyebrow quirked, tongue darting out just briefly to wet her lip. “You’re mysuperior.What if I say no?”
I didn't hesitate. “Then that's the end. I walk back out that door and we never speak of this again.”Fuck. A hollow ache settled in my chest, as a wave of disappointment washed over me. Had I misread this?
Her eyes never left mine, pinning me to my spot. “I could go to HR, Desmond,” she added, closing the distance between us.
