I’m not sure she’s even noticed her tears. She doesn’t wipe at them. I think she’s retreated fully inward.
She doesn’t seem to notice when Hawk pulls open the door and steps inside, either.
He’s quiet about it — just stands there, not saying anything as he takes in his daughter being sad as fuck.
When he looks my way, his expression is unreadable, but if I were to hazard a guess, I’d say he wants to both murder me and beg for my help. I glance between the two of them, then signal to Hawk that I have an idea and to stay where he is.
He shows me which finger I should get fucked with, but he stays put.
I step around Lana and press a mug of coffee into her hands. She blinks me into focus, thanking me in a whisper.
“You’re welcome. You know what would make you feel better?” I say with a gentle smile. “Something structured and familiar, with an uplifting feel — like running through the positive outcomes on that opportunity report your dad will have in his hands right now. The results are incredible, and he’s going to be even more proud of you when he sees that you’re capable of pulling it off.”
Eyebrows plunging, Lana opens her mouth to object, but I hush her with a finger against her lips.
“Heisproud of you,” I argue before she can say anything to the contrary. “He’s alwaysbeenproud of you. He just has a weird way of showing it, and we both know that weird doesn’t mean bad. It just means different. Different is good. Different iswhat gets results like the ones in your report. List them for me in the order you chose to write them — the order you figured he’d appreciate them most, starting with the best.”
Lana takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly, deflating her tense shoulders until they lower away from her ears.
“Cost benefits — item one: doubling last season’s gold total by productivity alterations made to the operation.”
“Double the total; double the profits. That’s fucking impressive, Lana.”
“Profit will technically more than triple from last season,” she corrects me, “since your math doesn’t account for all the variables, and that the highest gold total would also win us the end of season inter-claim wager as well,” she reminds me.
“That’s right. That’s some big money you’re talking about. Is that why you put it first on the list? It’s what Hawk would appreciate most?”
Lana shrugs. “It’s stressful being the boss. Money is security. If he doesn’t have to worry about working overtime to provide for people’s livelihoods, maybe he’ll have more time to do things he likes.”
“Like what?”
Lana shrugs again. “Making stuff with Martha. Sports games with Harper. Coming to terms with himself about Sadie Lawrence, so he can send her flowers and take her on picnics and shit. He pretends he doesn’t like that kind of thing, but I’ve never seen him more at peace than when he’s lying on a blanket outside, staring at the sky. I don’t know. He’ll probably just buy a new dozer or something. He likes those too.”
I note that she’s mentioned nothing to do with herself, and I nod as much to myself as to her. “What he really wants is a compact trommel with hydraulic riffles that he can tow more easily into the hard to reach places, but I figure you probably said dozer to make up for that one he lost to Scully in last year’swager. It’s not your fault he lost that, you know. He’s the one who gambled it. He knew the risk.”
Lana shakes her head and sips her coffee, still unaware that her father is leaning on the far wall behind her. “No, he didn’t. He didn’t understand what he was up against. My ideas were too… weird and hard to believe in.” She lowers her head and closes her eyes. “We should go find Martha and tell her to quit stalling or you’ll drag her to her truck.”
“I’m not laying hands on her. She bites,” I reply, hoping for a smile.
Lana laughs softly and nods. “We’d have to sedate her, obviously. But that would depend on our access to tranquilizers. Without them, I think the most efficient way to manhandle her into submission should only take about twelve hours. If we start now, we could be in Dawson by nightfall.”
I laugh and shake my head. “You’re underestimating how long it’ll take me to build a cage strong enough to hold her, and you’re off-topic. What’s the next thing your dad wants after the money? Tell me what else Hawk will get if you stay.”
Her eyebrows judge me in the sweetest way.
“He’ll get you.”
“And I’m… the guy who’ll be spending every night with his daughter. Why would he want that?”
“Because you make the money happen. You fix all his broken shit. You boost morale and productivity just by being present. You’re his reliable sounding board, and he can’t afford to lose you — financially or socially. He doesn’t like losing people, especially if he’s emotionally invested in them. It’s why he tries not to get attached to anyone, but you’re pretty irresistible, so he got sucked in before he had a chance to block you out. He’s going to forgive you. It’s inevitable.”
“And you?”
Lana shrugs and then shakes her head. “I don’t think so. We don’t have the same connection.”
“You’re hisdaughter.”
Lana gives me a weak smile. “Yeah, but there’s so much friction between us we can’t ever seem to get close. He’s not overly attached, which actually works in your favor. I’m the only daughter he’d ever forgive you for fucking, and I hope he does. I don’t want you to lose your family over me. You’ve been through enough.”
