He rubs his head with both hands and exhales slowly. “It’smethat I’m embarrassed by when you flop a punchline, Lana. It was my job to teach you, and I feel the failure when it’s clear you only inherited my penchant for fucking swearing. All of you pickedthatshit up like it was fucking candy — and to hear your moms tell it, it’s definitely all my fault.”
“That’s fair.” I smile as I nod. “Mom barely saysshitwhen she’s purple in the face with rage. I try my best to push her beyond it, but no matter what I do, cussing seems to be a hard limit for her.”
Dad chuckles softly. “You are pretty funny. And I know it’s wrong, but I like that you give her shit sometimes — even though she’d make me call to tell you to cut it out, I was always secretly glad I wasn’t the only one copping flak from you.”
I give him a small smile. “I try to share it evenly. My wrath is mainly triggered by bullshit and dickheads, and there are a lot ofthose around, so sometimes I have too much anger for just one person to catch. I’m working on rising above, but it’s a lot of deep breathing and counting and letting things go, and I’d rather just let a person know I’m mad at them so they can either fix what they did wrong or get the fuck out of my way.”
“As much as I hate it when I’m the dickhead within firing range, I do like that about you.” Dad’s chair creaks as he leans back in it, smiling. “This is nice.”
“It is,” I agree. “And I’m going to ruin it by pointing at this massive list and telling you I want to kick your ass for piling this extra work on me. You’re an absolute dickhead.”
His wince has a thinly veiled grin behind it. “I deserve that. What can I do to help clean up the mess?”
“Tell me where you plan for Sadie Lawrence to sleep,” I say, flipping through my file folders to find the accommodation setup. “Every trailer is already accounted for, and getting another one before she arrivestomorrow— dickhead — is not going to happen. It’s also going to eat into the accommodation budget that I already thinned so it could be dispersed into catering to get everyone eating the right food for optimal productivity. If you think I’m only mucking around with the feed rates of pay-dirt through the sluice boxes, and shaving a few seconds off the routes used by loaders and rock trucks here and there, you are fucking mistaken, sir. I have this shit honed for productivity right down to the fuckingmusicyour crew will listen to. Where is she sleeping? Your place?”
Dad’s eyebrows plunge downward. “No.”
“Why not? If you’re going to fuck her, she’ll need to be in close proximity. You can’t just fuck her in your office every day and then send her away each night. She’ll think you don’t care about her,” I point out. “Have you thoughtanyof this through?”
“Not really.” Dad’s face is bright red again, and he loosens his collar. “And I feel very uncomfortable talking to you about it. Please stop.”
I set the accommodation schedule aside with a sigh and run through hislate-additions listagain, putting marks beside things I’ll need to prioritize. “I still need an answer.”
“She can bunk with you,” he says, sounding pleased with himself.
“No. She most certainly cannot.” I glare at him. “That’snot happening. You have a spare room;youtake her. Let love blossom. Think of all that easy access — the warmth you could supply on cold nights, followed by secret smiles over morning coffee. It’s a hotbed of opportunity ripe for kindling romance. If you want to see fast results, you need to throw in a catalyst, and under those conditions, the relationship will either happen or it won’t. It’s really up to you. Either way, I refuse to share mysingle-sizedtrailer with your booty call. I can’t listen to her bitch about you being a creepy stalker-boss or the opposite if she’s going to be gushing about you being the best lay she’s ever had. Just,no. Plus, I need my privacy for any gentleman callersImight want to bang. No fucking way is she living with me.”
Dad’s gripping his desk, and his knuckles are basically white from the strength he’s using to keep his shit together.
“It would be inappropriate to move her into my place, Goose,” he says, working hard to force the words evenly through his teeth. “How would that look? She probably doesn’t even know that I like her.Idon’t even know. Maybe Idon’tlike her.”
“Yeah, but you don’t hate her,” I remind him with his own words, laughing at my joke.
He’s not laughing.
“C’mon, Dad. That was funny. I bet if anyone else had been here to hear it, they’d have laughed.”
“Then let that be a lesson about audience,” he suggests. “Like learning not to mention your intention to entertain men in your trailer to your father. And while we’re at it, I don’t think gentlemenbang.”
“I saidI’dbe bangingthem,” I clarify with a straight face. “And I think even the gentlest of menfolk could be driven to really nail a woman, given the right motivation.”
His hands fly to his ears. “Lana.”
I lean back in my chair and fold my arms. He’s missed almost all of my growing up, so maybe I’m frozen in time for him at the point we last really knew each other. Maybe I’m still three years old in his mind. I wait patiently for him to lower his hands.
“Is it safe?” he asks in a tone that suggests it had better be.
I give him a quizzical eyebrow twitch. “I guess. Can I ask a question?”
“Is it aboutbanging?” he snarls.
“Not directly,” I say, keeping my tone casual and light so he won’t get all weird again. “Do you want to be a grandfather one day?”
Eyes glued to mine, he grips the arms of his chair as if he needs extra support. “Where’s this headed?”
“Well, Martha’s as much of a workaholic as you are, and it’s really physical work — plus, I’m pretty sure she’s in love with the enemy. Do you think she’s interested in having a truckload of kids?”
Dad sits up a little straighter. “You think she’s in love with Reed?”
