27.London
Wednesday morning as I pulled my car into the B and B parking lot, my phone beeped several times, almost frantically. There was something about the rapid-fire text notifications that sent a shiver down my spine as I switched off the engine and reached for my purse. I rummaged through it for the device and reluctantly withdrew it.
The dread in my gut was validated at the sight of the unknown number texting me.
Heart in my throat, my anger mingled with fear as I tapped on the screen to open the thread.
You think I’m scared of your government dog?
Haven’t you learned your lesson yet?
No one can touch me or my family.
You think because I haven’t come for you yet that you’re off the hook?
That cunt is mine and soon I’m going to tug on its chain.
If I find his scent on it … I’m going to kill him. And his daughter.
And I’ll make you watch.
I’m coming for you.
You’ll learn to be a good girl again.
I love you so much.
Suddenly the air in the car seemed too thin. I shoved open the door, gasping for air as my chest tightened and tightened, suffocating me. The world spun, my vision going in and out as my body heaved for breath. For oxygen. My heart raced too fast. Too hard. I couldn’t focus. I couldn’t see properly.
I was dying.
I’m dying.
Oh my God, I’m dying.
“Spoon! Spoon!”
“London!”
I was only vaguely aware of their voices at first, splodgy shapes across my broken vision.
“Just breathe with me, London,” a deep familiar voice commanded.
Cool hands cupped my cheeks and Ramsay’s face suddenly came into focus. “Breathe, London. In and out,” he instructed calmly, and then he inhaled and exhaled slowly. “Focus on me and on your breathing.”
Like my body knew before my brain did that it needed to follow his lead, I started to inhale and exhale slowly on autopilot. In a while, the fast heaving of my chest calmed, and the world started to come back into focus.
My butt was cold and uncomfortable because I was sitting on the gravel ground, my back against my car, Nee and Ramsay knelt in front of me. Nee’s face was pale, her eyes wide with worry. Ramsay was stoic as always, but I saw the glimmer of concern in his expression.
“Spoon, what happened?”
There was sticky wet on my cheeks, and I reached to touch them, realizing I’d been crying too. It took a minute for it to come back to me, and I was seized by that sharp compression around my chest.
“It’s all right.” Ramsay reached out again to squeeze my arm. “Whatever it is, you’re safe. You’re safe. You had a panic attack, London. You’re going to do your best not to have another, aren’t you?” He gave me a small wink that was so unlike him, it actually did reassure me.
“M-my phone. In my car.” I hadn’t wanted Nee to know about Nick, but I didn’t know how else to explain the panic attack.
Unfortunately, Nee stood and reached into the car first. She backed out, standing tall, my phone in her hand. And my best friend knew my passcode.
