Altogether the plan was simple, which is what made it both terrible and effective.
Unfortunately, Ben did not make it to work today. Wade and I were waiting outside his building to help him pack up for a little trip. The rehab facility I chose for Ben was far enough away that he wouldn’t be feeling the backlash from the events of tonight, and it will all be dealt with before he’s back in town. Hopefully.
I had sat quietly with Ben while he filtered through different emotions at record speed. First was denial that he hadn’t done anything wrong, then anger that he didn’t have a problem, finally landing on panic that I was either there to kill him or have him arrested.
He accepted my help in the end, though he remained skeptical it wasn’t a trap the entire time I explained where he was going. I don’t think he will really accept any of this until he is far away from here, and me.
I told him that whenever he was ready to come back the job would be waiting for him, and his treatment was taken care of for however long he needed to be there.
He didn’t ask about his current apartment or bills, but I wasn’t going to bring it up if he didn’t. Those bills would be covered as well, a home for him to return to if he wanted it. If he wanted to start over somewhere new, he would be given whatever he needed to do that too.
I had meant what I said, Ben wasn’t my problem, and I wasn’t interested in playing judge and jury. What he decided to do with his life after this was his choice, I just gave him the opportunity to make that choice with a clear head, and a professional staff for support.
I only asked for one thing in return, his phone.
He handed it over quickly, almost frantic to be rid of it. The moment it was dropped into my palm, he seemed to take his first real breath. Like the first step to cut this disease out of his life was to cut out the connection to the ones who thrived on it.
While Ben was safely tucked away, the more difficult part of my night began. It’s not like I could suddenly closeCirquefor the night without alerting everyone that something was going on. The last thing this plan needed was a big neon sign that said, “Look at us. Something fucked up is happening!” So here I am, saying hello to a congressional candidate and his team as my eyes sweep the floor for any sign of my special guest.
He’s droning on about his political agenda and the struggles of a campaign when my eyes drag over Colton at the back of the bar, where Wade greets him before they both turn to look at the closed door of my office.
Colton and Wade part—Wade heading to my office as Colton weaves through the group to meet me at the table.
“Your special guest has arrived, Ms. Mathers. He is waiting in your office. Sadie and Wade are already inside, waiting for you.”
The candidate looks insulted for the briefest moment, but the promise of a hefty donation eases the sting of being abandoned in favor of aspecial guest. Trust me, bud, you don’t want to be on this VIP list.
I open the door to my office. Wade and Sadie are inside with my new best friend sitting in a chair in the dead center of the room, zip ties anchoring each ankle and wrist to the armchair.
I stop over the threshold, Colton bumping into my back and then cursing under his breath as I back into him a step and close the door again, turning to face him.
“Colton, that will be all for tonight. Thank you.”
His body snaps back as if he’s had the wind knocked out ofhim. The shock is fleeting though, as he steps forward into my space, not a care for who can see us as I take a quick peek around at any lingering eyes.
“Like hell it is, Harper. I’m not leaving you to do this alone,” he seethes.
“I’m not alone. Sadie and Wade are in there. I don’t need you for this.”
He makes a noise somewhere between a scoff and a laugh, derision in his words. “I don’t think youneedme for anything, Harper. Doesn’t make me want to be there for you any less.”
I don’t reply, hand still twisted behind my back, grip tight on the door handle.
“You said you trusted me. Why tell me the plan—why let me decide if I wanted to be involved if you were going to stop me here?”
Because this is different. This isn’t about his opinion ofCirque. This is about his opinion ofme. If I let him into that room, there is no going back. Hearing about what I’ve done and seeing it firsthand are not the same.
“Telling you the plan is one thing. Having you be a part of it was never what I intended. Going into that room will drag you into this mess with no way out. You will beinthis, and there is no coming back from that.” I whisper-shout at him.
He leans around me to put his hand over mine on the handle. “You keep saying that I can’t feel this way about you because I don’t understand. Then show me, Harper. I already love the good and the bad, so show me the wicked. Drag me down.”
24
COLTON
Istep over the threshold, trailing behind Harper, practically glued to her back so she can’t panic and change her mind again.
She stops and I move to stand at her side, eyes tracing her features. But there is nothing to see there.
