‘No. I suppose not.’
But a part of me does believe it. Granted, it does seem a bit extreme, but it’s a huge coincidence that it happened on precisely the same day that Eva hit Lauren. I mean, who else could it have been? Who else would do something like that? Unless… could it be something to do with Katie getting lost this morning? Could someone have seen her leaving the house, and then vandalised my car as a reaction? I don’t know what to think. Unease ripples across my shoulders and trickles down my back. I shiver, wishing I could shake off these dark thoughts. But my mind is full of questions. And I have a feeling that finding the answers will be far from easy.
Nine
I’m early. There’s still ten minutes until the gates open for school pickup, but I wanted to get here in plenty of time. I need to see if Rebecca’s here. Even though she took Lauren to A & E, she still has to pick up her youngest, Ethan, who’s in Katie’s class. I reverse into a tiny parking space and marvel at how much easier it is to park Robert’s Golf than my huge CR-V. I couldn’t face seeing that awful graffiti again, so my husband said he would pick up my car and take it to the body shop to be resprayed.
At least it’s stopped raining. As I step onto the wet pavement and start walking around the corner to school, I realise my heart is pounding. Will everyone know what’s happened? Will they all be judging me? Talking about me and Eva? Hopefully the news won’t have travelled yet. Unless Rebecca has told everyone already.
‘Gemma!’
I turn to see Suri jogging down the road behind me, dark curls bouncing around her shoulders. I wave and wait for her to catch up.
‘I thought it was you,’ she says. ‘I was parked behind you, you know.’
‘Sorry, I was in a world of my own.’
We start walking in step towards the school gates. ‘Have you spoken to Rebecca yet, about… this morning?’
This confirms my suspicions that Rebecca has already been trigger happy with the school grapevine. ‘I’m going to speak to her now – if she’ll let me.’ I follow Suri’s gaze to see the usual huddle of school mums in the playground over by the fence. My insides churn, but the sooner I get this done, the sooner it’ll be over. ‘Wish me luck.’
Suri squeezes my arm and crosses her fingers. ‘Don’t worry, she’ll have calmed down by now.’
‘Hope you’re right. I always feel so inadequate around that woman.’
‘Inadequate? Psht.’ Suri shakes her head. ‘You’re the perfect mother with the perfect family. You’ve got it all, Gemma.’
I look up at my friend, trying to work out if she’s trying to be funny. But her expression is sympathetic. I sigh. ‘It might look perfect from the outside, but some days it feels like I’m barely holding it together.’
‘Well, you don’t show it,’ Suri says. ‘Look, just hold your head up, apologise, and if she doesn’t accept it, then she’s not worth bothering with.’
Suri’s right. Rebecca will get over it. They’re just kids. And kids do stupid things all the time. No one’s died. I’ll apologise to her and that will be that.
But as I approach the school gates and see Rebecca holding court surrounded by all the other Year 6 mums, I seriously consider turning around and going back to the car. I could come back a bit later when everyone’s left. Call the school and tell them I’m running five minutes late… For goodness sake, I’m a grown woman. I need to get a grip.
Rebecca catches my eye but pretends not to have seen me, resuming her conversation with Clarissa, Jodie’s mum. I wonder how, as a reasonably successful businesswoman, I can feel so intimidated by a group of mothers, when I can stand up and give a speech in front of a roomful of professional business people without so much as a hand tremor. Again I can’t help wondering if she’s the person who vandalised my car. It seems extreme, but who else would have done such a thing?
I square my shoulders and approach the group, giving tentative smiles to some of the other parents. They smile back, but without too much warmth, and then turn their attention immediately back to Rebecca, nodding in my direction. Rebecca turns around to face me, beach-blonde waves framing her freckled face, like a lion’s mane.
‘What is it, Gemma?’
‘Can I have a private word?’ I ask quietly.
‘You do know I had to take Lauren to accident and emergency this morning?’ she says loudly.
So no private word then.
‘I would have at least expected a call from you,’ she says.
‘I know. I wanted to come and apologise. See how she’s doing. But Miss Chalmers said you were at the hospital, so I didn’t want to disturb you. How is she?’
‘We have to keep an eye on her overnight,’ Rebecca says.
My heart sinks. ‘They kept her in?’
‘No. She’s at home now. My sister’s there, looking after her.’
‘So she’s okay?’
