I don’t see him until he’s almost directly in front of me, and then he’s wrapping me in a tight, desperate hug. I feel a thousand emotions in the embrace with my friend as I wrap my arms around his neck and embrace him back.
We pull apart as dread fills me like a boat about to go under. “Where is he?” I whisper.
I look at is face, and my heart leaves my body. It’s not outright anguish, so there’s still hope, but Daegan is most certainly not with Raef.
He runs a hand down his frazzled, somber face, looking behind me, assessing. “We got separated. I went back to look for him after the wraiths massacred that field, but I couldn’t find him anywhere. Not a damn trace. I had no other choice but to head to Morne without him. I was taking a nap all alone in the trees over there when I heard you coming.”
Now he’s running two hands down his face, shaking his head.
“That’s good,” I say, attempting to reassure the both of us. And then I repeat it for good measure. “That’s good. It means he’s out there somewhere.”
Bobbing his head, he says, “He’ll find us.”
He looks me over quickly, realizing the frozen state I’m in, then gathers a few nearby sticks and debris, throws them down in front of me, and lights it.
I close my eyes in relief as I bask in the warmth, holding my hands out. Kezra finally emerges to enjoy the heat also. Raef nods her way, and she gives him an appreciative nod back, remaining silent.
“Was he… in trouble? Last you saw him?” I ask.
“No. He was…” Raef glances at me, holding back his words. “He was fighting Adrian in sword-to-sword last I saw him.”
My heart skips, but not for the reasons one might think. “Good. Adrian deserved to die,” I say coldly, with absolute confidence.
This makes Raef smirk. But then he looks at me curiously, his brows knitting together in concern. “That’s not like you to say… such a thing.”
I meet his gaze and the hollowness that I’ve felt since I was chased off that battlefield suddenly takes control again. “I’m not the same person I was three days ago,” I say in a flat, low voice. It’s not dramatic, it’s just the honest, painful truth.
Raef glances around again. “So you got separated from Rhydra?” he asks with heart-wrenching hope in his tone. “That’s okay. She’ll find us too.”
Like a coward, I avoid his eyes before I deliver the news. Raef and Rhydra escaped together over a year ago. They spent almost that entire time together, getting incredibly close. It was a platonic relationship, or maybe even more of a familial one. I’m not entirely sure because none of us have had time to sit around and have normal conversations together since they rescued me.
I still remember his shrieks in his dragon form as Meela died at his feet. Meela, the girl he was always bantering with, who I think he had a romantic interest in, even though she insisted she’d never love again. I never knew what really happened between them, but I saw the heartbreak in his eyes when we lost her. And now I have to tell him that Rhydra died in battle, right beside me.
I’m tired. Emotionally.
A jagged, hitched breath comes out of me. My chest hurts and my eyes burn with the memory, so fresh in my mind still. I fear it will always be there. “She won’t,” I finally whisper.
“What do you mean?”
I finally return my eyes to his, finding only a look of confusion. “She won’t be there.”
His face falls as the devastating realization instantly hits him. It’s not a twisted look of pain or agony, but something worse. He wears the look of stone-cold acceptance, his eyes seeming to take in less light than before. Ironically, it’s a similar look to Daegan’s stoic, dead-eyed expression, but it doesn’t fit on Raef’s face. Not at all.
He pulls me into him again, and I let more tears fall. “I was with her until the end,” I choke out.
After a pause, he strokes my hair and says, “Good. That’s good.”
The embrace doesn’t last long. We both realize we need to get moving again, so Raef shifts into his dragon form, instructs me to get on his back ina curt, flat tone that’s very unlike him, and we continue toward Morne. I curl around a large spike, savoring the warmth of his scaled body, and finally let myself give in to the fatigue that’s been haunting me for over a day.
Chapter 71
“He’ll be here,” I tell Raef, though I’m trying to convince myself and not let the panic rise and consume me like a flame. “Any time now.”
Raef says nothing, opting to chug a particularly large ale instead. The stress and sorrow are written all over his face, his usual smile nowhere to be found.
After I slept through the night and well into the next day while riding on his back, I scolded him for not waking me or taking a break himself. Eventually, we reached the run-down tavern we had all agreed to meet at, and so far, no one has batted an eye at us. The place is rather crowded for a smaller establishment, and most of the patrons look like hard-working citizens just trying to let loose after a long day of work.
The crowd is rambunctious, with musical instruments playing and people dancing. It doesn’t match our mood whatsoever, but this is where we must remain. I’ll sit here until he arrives or I’ll die waiting. I don’t care at this point.
