As we walk back to the locker room to change from practice, I let his words replay over and over in my head, giving me a lot to think about.
We finally finish up and start grabbing our things, making our way to the parking lot. I’m walking out of the building with Brayden and Brandon when I spot Kailyn leaning against the side of Brayden’s car.
“Hey, losers, about time you finished getting all dolled up in there,” Kailyn teases.
“Speak for your brothers. I was done twenty minutes ago,” I tease her back with a smile on my face.
Brayden unlocks his truck as the guys throw their gear in the back seat.
Kailyn appears next to me and smiles, her hair falling into her lashes.
On instinct, I find myself reaching for her face, myfingers softly brushing her cheekbone as I push her hair back and behind her ear. My hand stays there for just a moment longer before I drop it and watch as her face follows the movement. She’s silent as she slowly looks back up at me and smiles.
“I was wondering if you would like to come over and have dinner with us tomorrow? It’s Thanksgiving, and I thought it would be nice to celebrate with everyone.”
“Really?” This girl. She’s always thinking of others and has such a pure heart. The twins always invite me, and since my dad’s passed, I’ve gone every year. I don’t think she knows that, given how nervous she seems right now.
“Yeah, I thought it would be nice, and I figured who better to spend the day with than family.”
“You know me so well.” I smile at her, her nickname on the tip of my tongue, but I bite it back. I’m going to save that for the right moment. “I’d love to come over and have dinner.”
“Good, because we miss having you over.”
It feels like we’re the only two people here, like her siblings aren’t standing right by us. This moment is just for us. I don’t miss the true meaning behind those words: that it’s not about her family missing me, but her missing me.
If my walls weren’t already starting to crumble, then this would definitely do it. Knowing that we’re having this moment in front of her siblings, and that she really, truly misses me, that she’s being open right now, it’s making me rethink everything I thought was right. Connor’s words from earlier hit me again, and I think I truly understand what he was saying to me now more than ever.
I was mad at her for not communicating with me and running, but aren’t I doing the same thing? Am I letting my fears rule my actions and choices when it comes to her?
“All right, ladies, we don’t wanna be late for dinner now, do we?” Brayden chimes in.
“I mean, we’re already late, so we can’t exactly be on time,” Brandon jokes.
“Shut up, you know what I mean.”
The twins joke back and forth as they hop into Brayden’s truck and wait for Kailyn to join them.
“So I guess I’ll see you tomorrow, then?” She asks shyly.
I place my fingers under her chin, lifting it so she's looking right at me.
From this angle, there are green flecks in her eyes and I just want to get lost in her beautiful gaze. I used to feel like I could read her pretty well based on her actions, her body language and her tells. But now I love that I get to learn new things about her, get to discover new meanings behind each look, each touch, and find out things I didn’t know about her before.
“I wouldn’t miss it for anything.”
Chapter 14
Jake
Ispend the drive to the Taylors’ house the following day feeling like there’s a ball of nerves stuck in my throat, but I also feel butterflies in my stomach.
Before my dad passed away, we would usually celebrate holidays together or we would join the Taylors, especially during his last couple years. They reminded me of the family I had in them, and I was grateful to have them more than ever. There were some years that they spent the holidays in California with Kailyn, and I decided not to attend. So the thought that this will be my first Thanksgiving with her after all this time makes me excited and nervous.
As I sit in the silence of this car ride, my thoughts start to drift back to what I thought life would look like now. This is our second chance to have what we always dreamed of, even if things look a little different.
I’m done holding the past over our heads, letting my hurt and anger dictate my life. It’s time to truly start living instead of letting life pass me by.
I don’t want to waste any more time living in fear or sitting on the bench. I want to be all in with Kailyn.
