Her other hand goes to my chest, not to push me away, but to steady herself. The slightest tremble betrays her.
She swallows hard. “I d—” Then she closes her eyes, collectsherself, and when she opens them again, the ice is back. “I don’t have the luxury,” she says, quiet but fierce, “of making decisions based on how I feel.”
The words hit me harder than if she’d laid hands on me.
She presses her palm to my chest and pushes just enough to signal me to step back. Not enough to break the tension. Not enough to breathe. But the small space between us might as well be the Grand Canyon.
“I don’t make decisions based on how I feel, either.” I tilt her chin up, forcing her to look me in the eye. “But I don’t seem to have the luxury of staying away from you.”
Our breathing grows noticeably heavy.
“And what about Hudson?” she asks defiantly.
I shake my head and take a step back. I release her hand and it feels painful to not touch her. “Yeah, this is complicated, you’re right about that, but it doesn’t seem to be keeping me away, does it?”
“Does he know you’re here?”
That question makes me pause. I didn’t tell him. I had Eva help me locate her address, but didn’t loop him in. I told myself it wasn’t a big deal, but it seems like one now that Pippa is calling me out on my own bullshit.
Fuck.
After a few beats, she says, “I didn’t think so. You should go.” She points to the door. “We’ll be in touch about Vale.”
“Pippa—” I start, not sure how to finish that sentence. I step closer. I have to close my fists to stop myself from touching her. “This isn’t over.”
“I know,” she breathes out. “But you know this is a bad idea.”
“The worst.”
“Then tell me why you’re really here, Enzo. I know it’s not about an alliance.”
“I wish I fucking knew, Pippa.”
We are staring at each other, both vibrating as we breathe in and out, using all our restraint to not touch each other again.
“Fuck it,” she says and then her lips are on mine, her arms around my neck. My arms wrap around her waist to pull her deeper into the kiss.
We are ravenous—tongues colliding, breathing each other in, kissing like we might not survive the next moment without them.
I move one hand into her hair, pulling slightly at the nape of her neck.
Her breath hitches as she moans into my mouth. Her arms drop to my waist as we begin our exploration of touches, caresses, squeezes.
My erection presses into her stomach. “Pippa, I need?—”
“Yes, I?—”
More moans, more touches.
“Fuck. We should stop.” I need to stop this. Can I stop this?
“Mm…probably,” she says as she kisses my neck.
My already racing heartbeat speeds up. Hudson’s face enters the forefront of my mind. I find my last ounce of self-control and pull back.
I can’t do this.
Not yet. I need to know what he wants.
