“Drea, yes you do. If you love her?—”
“Love? Who said anything about love?”
She glared at me. “Really? You’re wallowing and working yourself sick, not eating and barely sleeping, because youaren’tin love with her? Stop lying to yourself, Drea. Not every relationship is going to be like your parents. You are not them, and neither is she. You can deny your feelings all you want. I don’t care. But if you want her back, then get up, close the store, get some sleep, maybe take a shower, and come up with a game plan to do so. But step one, get some damn rest!”
“Jesus, Pen, did Fallon plan that speech?” I laughed when she swatted my arm.
“You can afford to close the store for a few hours. Go home and get some sleep.”
I groaned, knowing she was right. “If it gets you to leave and stop talking about her, then fine, I’ll go.”
I reluctantly closed early and headed home. I walked into my empty house, checked my empty phone before I put it on the nightstand, and climbed into myempty bed.
As soon as my head hit the pillow, all the feelings I’d kept in for the past several weeks came rushing out. One tear for every fucked-up word I said, until I ran out of words and tears and fell asleep.
“Blair!” I woke up from a nightmare screaming Blair’s name and panting. It was the night we broke up, but instead of being in the bookstore, we were outside in a storm. I was yelling for her as she walked away, and she was about to walk off a cliff when I woke up.
I instinctively reached over to her side of the bed to reassure myself she was safe, only to realize my sleeping nightmare was similar to my waking one… She was gone.
Penelope was right, though. After thirteen hours of sleep, I felt a little better and ready for what I had planned that day. I wanted to make things right, and my first stop was Cara.
I knew if I went to her office, her assistant would most likely not let me in the door, so I did the next best thing and went to her house. I might regret it, but I needed to try.
“You have got to be kidding me!” Cara groaned as she opened the door to my timid smiling face.
“Hi,” I said nervously.
“What on earth do you want? Haven’t you done enough?”
I expected her to slam the door in my face, and there was still time for that, but so far, all she did was cross her arms over her chest and lean against the doorframe with an angry expression.
“Can we talk? Please?”
“I don’t think we have anything else to talk about. You fucked my client, lied to me, and ruined our friendship in the process. Did I leave anything out?”
I groaned. “No, just, please let me in so we can talk, Cara.”
She sighed but reluctantly opened the door for me to step inside. “Five minutes, Drea!”
She walked me to the kitchen, and I sat down at the table. “Water?” she asked. She might hate me, but she was still a good host.
I shook my head. “No, thank you. Look?—”
“Don’t waste your breath. I already know what you’re going to say. You’re sorry for keeping it from me, you’re sorry for lying about it, and you wish you could take it back, right?”
“I really am sorry, Cara. It was not my intention to fall?—”
She scoffed. “What? Fall in love? Don’t tell me you actually love her. You aren’t capable of that emotion. Just ask Skylar. Oh, wait, you can’t because she left you.”
I sighed. “That was a low blow, Cara, but I deserved it, I know.”
I didn’t want to tell anyone before telling Blair how I felt, but I needed Cara to know I was serious.
“She wasn’t just another lay to me, Cara. I did; I fell in love with her. I know I can’t take any of it back, but I am sorry for everything I said. I was drunk, and you wouldn’t stop pressuring me to go out with someone, and I was tired of hiding it from you. I never got the chance to tell her how I felt because I was scared, but I’m sorry. I know none of that is an excuse for hiding it from you. You deserved a lot better, and I wish I could change things.”
“You really think you can come here with a sob story about love and I’ll forgive you? You lied to me, Drea. You were dating my best friend, or whatever the fuck it was you two were doing, and you both felt the need to pretend nothing was going on, and you even had a discussion about hiding it from me. That is the part that hurts the most. If you would have told me from the start, I wouldn’t have been so upset. Shocked, hell yes, but I would have understood.”
“I know. We wanted to tell you. She was heartbroken that she couldn’t share it with you, but we both thought it would be for the best. Maybe that wasn’t for us to decide, I don’t know. Maybe we shouldn’t have asked Kaia to?—”
