“My dad cried for the longest time, and I just held him.” He kept fiddling with the toy truck.
“I’m so sorry, Ash.”
“Yeah. Me too.”
I didn’t know what else to say, but he asked me if he could focus more on reading than talking.
I let him get back to his book, but after school, when he met me at my locker to walk me to Ellie’s car, I gave him a hug. He didn’t let go for a long time, but I didn’t mind.
I’d hug him forever if he allowed me to.
***
The next day, Ash seemed a little less sad.
I brought him his favorite candy bar, a Twix.
He smiled a little as he thanked me. I moved my hair slightly in front of my eyes.
“Why do you do that?” Ash asked me as he picked the pepperoni off his pizza and ate them separately.
“Do what?”
“Hide your face with your hair.”
He noticed? “I don’t like my scars.”
“Why not?”
I narrowed my eyes in confusion. “Because they are ugly.”
“Says who?”
“Uh, I don’t know. Every human ever known to mankind.”
Ash grimaced and stared down at his pizza, which he kept picking at. He didn’t say anything for a while until he asked, “Have you ever heard of the Japanese art form called Kintsugi?”
I shook my head.
He kept staring down at his lunch tray. “It’s a technique for repairing broken pottery by mending the cracks with gold, making the cracks a part of the story, not something to be hidden.” He looked up toward me and shrugged his left shoulder. “I think your scars are like that.”
“You think my face is like a broken bowl?”
“Yes, no, I mean, well, uh...” He stumbled over his words, and admittedly, that was kind of cute. “What I’m trying to say is that the scars are beautiful. You’re still you, but just more... gold? I don’t know. Never mind.”
I smiled shyly.
Did he just call me beautiful?
He cleared his throat and rubbed the back of his neck. “Anyway, I don’t think you’re supposed to hide your cracks. I think you’re supposed to let them be a new part of your story.”
I looked away from him for a split second, taking in his words. I spoke softer. “Ash?”
“Yeah?”
“You’re making it really hard for me to hate myself.”
He grinned but didn’t say another word.
