He placed a finger beneath my chin, tilting my head up to meet his stare.
I wanted to kiss him. Oh, how I wanted to kiss him so very much.
I’d never been kissed before. I always wanted to know what it felt like, but even more so, I wanted to know what a kiss felt like from him.
Before my nerves could take over, before I could overthink the possibility of kissing and if I would be good or bad at it, Ash took the lead.
He wrapped an arm around my back and pulled me in toward him. Without hesitation, without a moment of concern, his lips met mine. He kissed me deeply, causing a wave of tingling sensations to travel through my whole body. He took the lead, and I followed his steps. He parted my mouth with his tongue as I melted into his arms, kissing him back.
I kissed him back.Oh my gosh, how I kissed him back.
All my thoughts went away, and I acted solely on feeling. I fell into him as I wrapped my arms around his neck. Even though I’d never been kissed, I knew exactly how to kiss him. Kissing Ash came to me as easily as breathing did.
I didn’t know if this was what kissing felt like to everyone else in the world, but oh, how I hoped it did. I hoped it felt like heaven overtaking hell, as if there were no longer any issues left on the earth. I hoped it felt healing. I hoped it felt meant to be.
I hoped it felt free, unapologetic, and real.
Ash kissed me again and again until I giggled, my lips still grazing over his. I was dizzy, but I liked the buzz. I felt as if I were somehow floating away and landing gently against the shore all at the same time. Maybe that was what kissing was when you kissed the right person—everything, every feeling, all at once.
I hoped he’d kiss me forever, and then a little longer after that.
46Ash
Maa:Happy Birthday, Ashish. I hope it’s a great day.
I stared down at the text message from my mother that afternoon. It was one of the consistent things I could expect from her. We didn’t talk much, but those birthday greetings always came through.
I hated my birthday, but that was nothing new. It was a big night for me, but I was doing my best not to think about it. Chase and the guys all wanted to go out to celebrate my birthday, even though I told them I hated celebrating. Ever since my father passed away, I had sort of stopped celebrating it. I didn’t think it was fair for me to celebrate my birthday when Rian and Dad couldn’t do the same.
It wasn’t until about two years ago that the guys found out my birthday, and they proceeded to get me wasted off my ass. After that, they said the nonbirthday-celebration tradition needed to continue on. I told them they could only go out with me if they made no mention of what the day was. It was just five guys out getting drinks. Well, them and, now, Karla.
After a long shift a few weeks ago, Chase met Karla and me for a few drinks. He then invited her to join me and the guys for the celebration, without telling her it would be my birthday. He knew exactly what he was doing, though. He wanted to make sure she was there on the day we werenotcelebrating. That sentimental dude probably thought it was important for her to be there.
I didn’t mind her being invited. I always liked having her around. I was just trying to make sense of the fact that Karla was going to meet all the guys, all at once. I wasn’t nervous for her to meet them. They’d love her because they loved me. I was more nervous about what they were going to say to her. Those guys had no house-training. Half the time I never knew what was gonna come out of their mouths. I just hoped Karla would be able to keep up with their banter.
***
Well, I’d be damned.
Karla and the boys bantered like no one else.
The second Karla and I showed up to the bar, the guys took her under their wings. They didn’t treat her like one of the guys, though. They treated her like she was a princess, making sure she always had a drink in her hand. They kept her laughing the whole night, too, which made me happy. When she felt good, I felt good.
I think them being so warm was probably their nonbirthday gift to me. Because they knew if she was happy, I’d be happy.
And damn... I was happy.
Throughout the night, Karla and I shared kisses, and I couldn’t stop myself from wanting to touch her, to be close to her, to have all of her as mine. It felt good to steal small kisses from her in public, and I loved how she’d giggle against my lips as if the kisses made her shy.
“She’s got spunk,” Luke mentioned later, as we sat at our table together. He patted me on my back. “And she can sass with Chase like no other. It’s like you have two Chases at once.”
I smirked. Karla and Chase were off in the corner talking about something. They acted like siblings. I couldn’t be happier about my best friend getting along with my girl.
My girl...
Wow.
It felt good to think of her as mine. It felt right. As if it was something she was always meant to be.
