I minimize Slack and try to pay attention as Erica walks us through a chart breaking down the building blocks of strong promotional copy. But the next time we’re in a meeting and Al pantomimes painting a wall when Erica’s back is turned, I have to think it was worth the risk.
Chapter
16
At night, it’s painfully obvious this house is too big for one person. The silence is so loud, it drains all my energy the moment I get home.
I don’t know how Mom could make whole meals after work. I pull together some rice and sardines—my comfort food, the thing Mom would make whenever she was exhausted. Which meant she made it a lot when I was a kid, in the years after Dad left.
After I wash the dishes, I collapse onto the couch and google Mark Winterson again.
I keep thinking about how he looked at me at the reunion. It’s been a long time since I felt desirable—a couple years, at least? It’s hard to remember. All the dead-end app dates that may as well have been job interviews blur together.
Apparently Mark Winterson launched and sold his first company in college. He’s on the board of several philanthropic organizations. One of the first autocomplete suggestions for his name ismark winterson girlfriend,followed bymark winterson height,which makes me snort.
sampaguita72:
Ruby, what are you doing tonight?
I hope you’re not staying out late
That must mean she can’t see what I’m doing on my personal phone. So that’s a relief, at least.
sampaguita72:
Roobs, I see why Erica said your copy was missing something
I see where you went wrong
You have to—
I swipe the notification away before I can read the rest. We used to do this when she was alive. She’d dissect all my failures from the day to help me improve—ask me about every little thing my boss said, every sour note, turn it over, examine it. Like we could prevent more of them by doing that, eradicate disappointment at the source.
Without knowing exactly what she said, I write back:
ruby.ocampo:
Okay, I’ll try!
I take a deep breath, hold and release it, guilt surging raw through my veins.
A knock on the door outside makes me jump, and on the Ring, I see Greg standing on the front steps, holding another casserole dish.
I try to channel some Greg-style nonchalance before I open the door. “Seeing an awful lot of you lately.”
He slips off his shoes, brushes past me, and heads for the kitchen. “You shouldn’t be alone with a ghost.”
“She must be haunting the server, right?” I trail behind him, trying not to think anything in particular about the width of his back. “My housefeelshaunted, but technically the haunting is cloud-based.”
Greg closes the fridge and grabs the phone out of my hand. “You know what I mean. Too much screen time.” His eyebrows go up. “You’re googling Mark Winterson?”
I snatch it back from him. “It’s normal to google the people you work with. It’s just, like, due diligence.”
“Sure, you workwithhim.” Greg plops down on the couch and peers at me over the back. “Is he…your person in a higher tax bracket?”
I cross my arms. “Why, you don’t approve?”
“Is he your type?” He looks at me searchingly. “Or is he yourmom’s type?”
