“I did.”
“Then why would you risk your good name and reputation?”
Tears welled once more in her sister’s eyes, and Máira dabbed them away. “I love him.”
If there was one emotion she understood, it was the foolish emotion called love, but it wasn’t real. Members of the ton didn’t expect to love a spouse—ever. Love for a sibling or a child, that was real. Love between a man and a woman? That was a fleeting fantasy that would tear a person in two. “Does he love you?” She asked despite knowing the answer.
“I thought he did, but he didn’t.”
Of course he didn’t. “What are you going to do?”
“I’m going home.”
“To Iseabail’s?”
“No, to Urquhart Castle. I asked Ross before he left and he said I could go if I traveled with my maid and outriders.”
“Then what?”
“Then I will have the peace and quiet to decide what I’m going to do.”
“Have you told your husband?”
“No, he is no longer my husband. Besides, he’s returned to the sea. I have no idea how to reach him.”
“But Ross?—"
“No, Caillen. I do not wish for Ross to know. You cannot tell him, or Iseabail.”
“Máira—”
“No, Caillen,” she said, her voice more forceful this time. “I must insist on you not telling them. They will try to talk me into marrying Elias again, but I will not marry a man who clearly does not want me as his wife. Swear to me you will let me tell them when I am ready.”
“You’re certain?”
Máira nodded. “I am.”
Caillen believed her. In their short conversation, it was as if her sister had found her strength once more and knew what path she wanted to take. At least for now.
“When will you leave?”
“Tomorrow. I think it’s best others don’t see me get sick too often.”
“Does it happen often?”
“Only when I walk.” A grin spread across Máira’s face and they laughed together.
“That’s what mother said when she was pregnant with Robina.”
Máira’s eyes twinkled and a dimple appeared on her cheek. “It was enough for us to make a pact to never have children. It seems you were the first one to break that pact and owe the forfeit.”
“No, Iseabail broke it long before me. We’ll have to collect from her. From what she experienced and from my easy pregnancy,” Caillen lied with an ease that shocked her, “I guess you are the one who is more like our mother than any of us realized.”
“You have no idea.” Máira stood and put on her coat.
Caillen handed her a decorative vase. “Just in case you need it by the time you get to the carriage.”
“I would give it back to you, but I’m afraid I’ll put it to good use.”
