“Maybe later, when your mom wakes up, I’ll take you into the shower and show you what I’ve got in my head.”
She let out a slow, shaking exhale. “I love you, McCrae.”
She saw the surprise in his eyes.
Likely, it was the sudden admission, but it wasn’t all that surprising to her.
“I’ve felt it for a while,” she explained. “I just haven’t… haven’t had the courage to tell you. I felt like… like we might be too much for you. All of us. I can feel that you don’t like to be smothered with love and your family, your mom and your sister, there’s so much love there. I feel you pulling away at times, trying to put some distance between you.”
When she finished speaking, he was quiet.
Almost introspective.
And she worried that she’d misjudged him or hurt his feelings proving that she wasn’t all that good with people, living ones.
Her mother loved her no matter what.
Her baby? Of course Ciela loved her, Ciela’s heart was as big and wide as Texas and then some.
Ciela’s dad had been so easy-going, they worked because he accepted her like he did everyone around him, on face value and she’d appreciated that, loved him for it.
McCrae was different.
He was particular about so many things.
He wasn’t someone who just accepted things the way they were.
“McCrae,” she began softly, “I’m so-”
“You’re right.”
He smiled at her.
“My mom, and my sister are like two peas in a pod. They’re both so… loving,” he frowned a little. “But they’re both a little… pushy with it. I love them, I doubt anyone would be able to avoid it, but they… overwhelm me. My dad was more like me. Strong. Standoffish.
“But he loved my mom like crazy. He’d deal with anything and everything she threw his way. I guess I’m like him in that way… but with you. You drive me crazy…” He shook his head. “Thinking of you- Seeing you in that garden center with that… that man, I wanted to murder him,” his voice was a rough scratch of sound, “I wanted to tear him apart to get to you.”
“I’m glad you didn’t have to, McCrae. I wouldn’t want you to have that on your conscience.”
He smiled at her and she saw a level of darkness in his gaze that she’d never seen before.
“It wouldn’t have bothered me,” he shook his head, “I could have taken him down and never thought about it again, unless it was to remember what I would do for you… for Cee. Make no mistake, ‘Elle. I’d kill for you and your daughter. I’d die for you, too. Can you… can you be okay with that?”
She took her hand from his and reached up, cupping it against the back of his neck. Noelle pulled him closer until they were forehead to forehead.
“I understand it. I don’t want to say that I’m okay with it,” she drew in a breath and let it out again, “but I am. If someone had hurt Ciela, the way they hurt Aracely, I doubt I could let them go. And I’d put myself between her and any danger. Car? Bullet? I’d gladly step in front of her.”
She loosened her hold on him and leaned back until she looked him in the eye.
“I’d do the same for you. When I say I love you, McCrae. It’s the same kind of love. All the way in love.” She smiled as astrange weight lifted off of her shoulders. “I want you around us just as much as you want to be with us.”
“Yeah?”
It sounded strange coming from him.
A lighter tone.
A younger tone.
