“You want to come?” He pulls my body back against his and trails slow kisses down my neck. My head tips back automatically, exposing my throat and my answer without words. I hum out my agreement just as his lips press against my Adams apple, the vibration sends tingles scattering across my skin.
“Good, because I want you to feel good, too.” That’s all he says before his mouth is claiming mine again, rocking his hips into me and chasing the release we both want from each other. His pace picks up, and his tongue explores. I’m struggling to concentrate amid all the different feelings happening throughout my body. I try to hold back, but the friction between us feels too good; there isn’t enough time to compose myself before the next pass of his length against mine inches me closer to the edge.
My stomach tightens, and my hips push forward. I can’t stop it now, I’m beyond the point of control.
“I’m–”
“Me too,” he pants out, working his hips faster, pushing forward and up whilst pulling me down against him. I can feel the pleasure rush along my length before a burst of hot come pulses out. My knees threaten to buckle, and my pelvis stutters into him. I can feel the sticky warmth coating the head of my erection as Zander presses himself against me and holds still. A groan leaves the depths of his throat before he can catch it as he pushes his forehead into the wall behind my shoulder. It’s the most erotic sound I think I’ve ever heard; the combination of seeing him in a completely different light, as well as the undeniable masculinity in his hold, only further affirms that he’s it for me– he’s always been it.
His hips twitch for a couple more thrusts as we both empty ourselves into our boxers. Zander has me caged between his body and the brick behind us. I can feel his heart hammering against my chest and his short, sharp breaths hitting my skin like tiny daggers. I’m not sure what to say, if anything. It would be polite to thank him, but somehow that seems wrong.
I’ve never experienced that level of pleasure outside of my own hand before. The thought of being with someone on such an intimate level has always left me feeling somewhat uncomfortable.Do you make noise, or does it just happen on its own? Do you talk, or do you keep quiet? Do you tell them when you're close to finishing, or do you just let it happen?
But with Zander, my body just knew what to do.
“You still with me?” He asks, tipping his head back to search my eyes.
“Always.” My answer softens the concern on his face, his worried mouth eases into a gentle smile. He leans forward and rubs his nose against mine. It’s a silly gesture, but after the intensity of what we just did, it’s perfect.
“Was that okay?” I don’t miss the doubt in his tone, and I remember it was a first for him, too.
“It was perfect, Zan. Anything with you is.” It’s my turn to reassure him now, and it seems to work. He rests his head against mine and weaves our fingers together. We just stay where we are, letting the darkness wrap around us. The shadows are the one place he feels most comfortable, the only place he’s ever really felt seen. So if I have to dim my light to stand by his side, that’s exactly what I’ll do.
When we finally emerge from what I learn is the stairway to the cellar, we’re greeted by none other than Toby.
“Didn’t realise you were into a bit ofeverything, Z,” Toby says, dragging his eyes suggestively up and down Zander’s frame. And just like that, I can feel the awkwardness creep back in. Not between Zander and me– it’s the societal pressure that usually looms over me when there are other people around. Interacting with Toby is much more difficult when alcohol isn’t involved.
“I’m not.” My stomach plummets.He’s not? Could have fooled me. I feel so stupid, my cheeks are burning, and my hand is growing sweaty in his grasp. I try to tug it back, hoping I can salvage a bit of the dignity he’s just tossed to the gutter, but he tightens his hold and refuses to let go.
“Just him,” he clarifies, looking only at me. It’s not exactly him ‘coming out’, it’s more like a promise that I am his, and he is mine. Everything falls away; the people, the noise, until it’s just us.
“Forever?” I risk asking.
“And a day.”
I left the pub before Zander’s shift ended; the need to shower settled in pretty fast. Mom was out for the evening with her girlfriends, something about bingo and naked butlers. I didn’t pay too much attention, just made sure that my number was in all her friends’ phones in case she needed anything. I’m glad she’s finally getting out again. The wheelchair was definitely worth the endless arguments, and she’s admitted as much, too.
With the house all to myself, I don’t waste time. Stripping off my sticky clothes in the kitchen, I toss them straight into the washing machine and set it to a hot wash. A random thought occurs as I make my way from the kitchen– I don’t think I’ve ever walked around the house naked before. The idea intrigues me, and my mood seems to be accommodating of new experiences tonight, apparently. The curtains are closed, where’s the harm? Mom won’t be back for a while yet, and Zander still has two hours left at work. Hitting shuffle on the music app–yes, I’m feeling extra adventurous–I turn right, bypassing the stairs, and head into the living room.
Tom Jones “Sexbomb” is the first song to come on, bringing an instant smile to my face. The lyrics, paired with my mood, are the perfect combination to get my foot tapping and eventually, my body swaying in sync. Because I’m me, when the song ends, I hit replay, putting it on an endless loop and giving into the freedom and euphoria coursing through my veins to the baritone rasp of Tom telling me “the route to go, to sex me slow”.
I dance, sing, and continue to feed the good mood clinging to me, forgetting about everything and everyone, just for a little while. After the second play, my mouth was drier than the Sahara, so I skidded into the kitchen like a child at a sports hall birthday party, catching myself on the counter and flicking on the cold tap. Pre-first-sexual-encounter, Jules would get a glass, check the bottom for dust, then fill it. ButthisJules, he’s a different species altogether. I stick my head under the tap and lap at the water. It runs in streams down my face and up my nose, adding to the amusement washing over me.
Vengaboys “Boom, boom, boom, boom” fills the air next– it’s quickly becoming one of the best nights of my life.
“I want you in my room,” I sing along, knowing exactly who I’m thinking of when my hips thrust in time with the chorus. Closing my eyes, all I see ishim; his smile, his hands, his mouth. There’s movement down below instantly, and I grin at the reaction. With Zander, there’s no worries or second-guessing; we just react to each other and let whatever happens, happen.
“You have me in your room every night, Jules.”
Fuck.My dancing stutters to a halt, and heat floods my face.
“You're back early,” my hands fly to my groin to hide the evidence of what his voice and presence do to me.
“Toby said I could leave early to get myself… how did he put it… Oh, yeah– ‘sucked and fucked,’before your Mom gets home,” he chuckles, but I can tell by the way his eyes are dancing across my body that he’s not opposed to the idea.
“He’s so crude,” my nose crinkles in disgust at his manager’s lack of boundaries, as Zander nods along.
“Looks like you’ve been having a good time…” I follow his eyes as they scan our surroundings; the droplets of water at my feet, the music playing from my phone on the table, and yep, me fully naked.
