I’m nervous, not because I’m worried about being around him, but because I want this.I want this to work, and I’m scared as hell that I won’t be able to get past the pain, or that something else will happen to tear us apart.That we were never meant to be after all.
“Speak, woman.Tell me what’s going on inside your head,” Kinzie demands as there’s a knock on my bedroom door.
I don’t even get to answer the knock before the door is pushed open, and in walks my sisters.Courtlynn has an iPad in her hand, which can only mean they’ve called Baylor so she, too, can witness my freak-out.
“How bad is she?”Baylor asks, her voice coming over the speakers of the iPad.
“I’m perfectly fine, thank you very much,” I sass.We all know I’m lying.However, there’s a warmth that fills my chest at knowing they’re all here for me—even Baylor, whom I miss fiercely.I need to find out when she’s coming home.
“I’m going with a seven out of ten,” Courtlynn tells her.
“Definitely,” Leighton agrees.
“You just walked into the room,” I defend.
Leighton shrugs.“I live here.I know you’ve been stressing since you agreed to dinner with him last night.”
“Oh, she was at a nine point five.I talked her down,” Kinzie tells them.
“What is this?‘Gang Up On Ellison Day?’”I huff out my irritation.I love them, but I’m also annoyed with them at the moment.
“It’s ‘Ellison Needs to Get Out of Her Head, and Let Her Heart Lead the Way Day,’” Leighton says.
“That she does,” Kinzie says, typing on her phone before placing it next to her on the bed.“Besides, Copeland will be here any minute.You need to wrap up the freak-out, my friend,” she tells me.
“Ellie, what’s going on?”Baylor asks.
I grab the iPad from Courtlynn and lie back on the bed, holding it in front of my face.“What’s going on is my head and my heart are at war.There are two huge pieces.On one hand, I have everything I’ve ever dreamed of, with the man who starred in those dreams.On the other hand, I have the pain, the feeling of not being enough for him, reminding me that if I get too close to the fire, I could get burned a second time.And you know what they say, right?Fool me once, shame on you.Fool me twice, shame on me, or something like that,” I ramble.
“That makes sense,” Baylor says slowly.“However, you can’t let the fear of the unknown keep you from trying, big sister.Look at me.I left for New York on my own.It was something I wanted, and I had to take the risk.”She pauses as I let her words sink in.“Let me ask you a question, Ellie.Is he worth it?Is Copeland worth the worry and the stress?”
“Yes.”I don’t hesitate with my answer.“He’s worth it.But am I?”
“You are,” a deep voice says from the doorway.
I gasp, drop the iPad, and sit up, staring at Copeland standing there, looking like my every fantasy.He’s in worn blue jeans, boots, and a black T-shirt.Nothing fancy.It’s not the clothing; it’s the man.
“W-What are you doing in here?”I ask, my eyes wide.I can hear Baylor asking what’s going on and the low hum of Courtlynn’s voice as she tells her.
“Kinzie texted me and told me to come on over, and that I should come upstairs,” he says, his eyes flashing to my best friend quickly, before coming back to mine.
“Well, my work here is done.”Kinzie slides off the bed.
“Kinzie,” I warn her.
She turns my way and smiles.“I know I was wrong.But I also know that you’re thinking too much.I know the past, I know the pain, but I also know what the view looks like from the outside looking in.”She steps in front of me and leans in for a hug.I hug her back on autopilot, my eyes still locked with Copeland’s.“Be happy, Ellie.We’re all here for you, no matter what,” she whispers.
“I do like the view,” Courtlynn muses.
“Me, too.”Baylor chuckles.
I glance over to see Courtlynn holding the iPad at an angle so Baylor can watch this all go down.Finally, my eyes land on Leighton.My quiet, reasonable sister.
“I don’t think Kinzie should have called him and told him to come up here.”
I nod, knowing she would be the reasonable one.
“However,” she says, and I groan, making everyone in the room laugh except for Copeland and me, “even after all these years, he still looks at you like you’re the air he needs to breathe.”
