“It’s perfect,” she argued, hugging the stuffie tighter. “Nibbles the honey badger. Every time I look at him, I’ll think of you.”
The words slipped out before she could stop them.
Tanner’s smile faded. He gazed at her for a moment before gesturing to the fallen log they often used as a chair. “Let’s have a seat.”
Something in her chest tightened as uncertainty had her pulse quickening at the tone of his words. She knew him well enough to know their conversation was shifting to something serious. She didn’t know what was on his mind, but suddenly, she was afraid of what he might say next.
“That’s partly why I gave him to you. So you would see him and think of me because… I’m not gonna be around as much for a while.”
There it was. She knew she hadn’t wanted to hear what was on his mind.
“What do you mean?” Swallowing hard, she did her best to control her emotions.
“I’m leaving, Junebug.”
She tried to push down her panic. That might not be so bad. He’d been on trips before. “Okay. When are you heading out and when will you be back?”
“I’m leaving tomorrow,” he said quietly. “Heading out for my first real rodeo on the circuit. I’m probably gonna be gone a while. Months, maybe longer, depending on how it goes.”
The panic bubbled up again, this time filling her whole chest andmaking it hard to breathe. He was leaving for months? Or even longer?
She stared down at Nibbles, fingers tracing his little ears. Time was needed to swallow the knot in her throat and blink back the tears threatening to blind her. There had to be something she could say that didn’t involve throwing herself at him and begging him to change his mind.
“So… wow,” she choked out. Clearing her throat, she tried again. “You’re really doing it.”
“Yeah.” His voice softened. “It’s what I’ve always wanted, Junie. You know that.”
She did know.
Riding in the rodeo was something he’d talked about forever. He’d do anything to stay on a horse, even herding cattle, which he loved to do more than any rancher she knew, not that she knew that many. Everyone knew Tanner Daniels could ride anything with four legs like he was born for it. For him, the rodeo made perfect sense.
But that didn’t make the ache in her chest hurt any less. It was like someone had shoved a hand inside there and ripped out her heart.
“I’ll miss you,” she whispered, still looking down at Nibbles and preening his fluffy ears.
“I’ll miss you too, Junebug.” He dropped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her into another hug.
She went willingly, pressing her face against his chest, breathing in the smell of leather, horse, and sunshine that was so perfectly Tanner.
“This is my shot, Junebug. I’ve gotta take it.”
She nodded, squishing Nibbles between them just so she could hug Tanner tightly. She’d give anything to be able to pretend everything was fine. But her pretender must have been broken because the tears had started slipping down her cheeks.
Gritting her teeth, she put on her best brave front. With thebrightest fake smile ever, she said, “You’re gonna be amazing. You’re going to win every single rodeo you enter. I just know it.”
He chuckled, the sound rumbling through his chest. “You always did believe in me more than I believed in myself.”
“Because I know you,” she said, pulling back just enough to look up at him and wipe her tears. “You’re the bravest, strongest, most stubborn person I’ve ever met. Not to mention the best rider. You’re going to be a legend, Tanner Daniels.”
Reaching down, he caught some of her tears with his fingers and shook his head. “Don’t waste these, they’re very valuable. One day you’ll find a boy worth shedding these over, Junebug. Anyway, I’ll be back before you know it.”
For a moment, he just looked at her while she tried desperately to stifle her emotions. Something soft and almost sad shone in his storm-blue eyes. Then he ruffled her hair the way he always did. “Promise you’ll text me?” he asked.
“Every day,” she said, brightening her voice. “And you better text back, or I’ll send Nibbles after you.”
They both laughed, and for a second, everything felt almost normal.
But it wasn’t normal. He was leaving. And some part of her was terrified she’d never see him again. She was sure he’d forget all about her and find some beautiful rodeo girl.
