“First rule: honesty, no matter what. We need to be open with what we’re both comfortable with. And what crosses a line. If you don’t like something, you tell me. If I don’t like something, I’ll tell you.”
I fold my hands in my lap. “Yeah, that’s a good one.”
“What are you comfortable with in bed?” he asks.
A flicker of nerves goes off inside of me. Why am I nervous all of a sudden? This whole “Blake teaches me to have sex” thing was my idea.
“Honestly, I’m not sure. I haven’t done much.”
“What have you done?” Blake asks.
“Kissing. Making out. And some fingering.”
“Are you able to have an orgasm from fingering?” he asks.
I shake my head. “No. I mean, I’ve only done it a couple of times, and not for very long. I didn’t love it.”
I fidget with the hem of my shirt. I catch Blake looking down at my hands.
“You okay, B?”
I let out a flustered laugh. “Yeah. I mean, kind of.” I sigh. “This is weird. The two of us talking like this. About sex.” I shake my head. “I mean, I know we need to. Iwantto. It’s just…different from what we normally talk about, and it’s throwing me off a little.”
“Hey.” He says softly before leaning forward and gently resting his big hand over both of mine. “It’s okay to be nervous. I’m nervous too.”
“You are?”
He nods, his blue eyes warm, his smile shy. “Of course I am. You’re my best friend. I want this to be good for you, but I’m nervous I’ll mess it up.” He hesitates, and his smile disappears. “I’m nervous I’ll do something, and you won’t like it or that it’ll hurt…” He swallows. “I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I hurt you, Briar.”
A tinge of guilt hits me. I’ve been so focused on myself that I didn’t even think about how he must be feeling.
“You would never hurt me, Blake. You’re the sweetest, most gentle person I’ve met. That’s why I asked you to do this with me.”
He blinks, and the worry in his gaze fades. “I’d hurt myself before I hurt you, Briar. You know that, right?”
My breath catches at the conviction in his tone. “I know,” I say softly.
“We just gotta push through the nerves and talk it out,” he says.
I nod. “Right. That’s what I think too. I just…might be a little awkward while we talk.”
The corner of his mouth hooks up in a sexy half-smile. “You’re adorable, not awkward.”
My tummy flips at how sweet and kind he is.
I take a breath, a little less nervous now that I know how Blake feels. Yeah, he’s more sexually experienced than me, but knowing that we’re both nervous makes me feel better. Like things are a little more even between us.
He pulls his hand away from me and sits up in his chair. “Do you want to try fingering again?” His tone is gentle and soft.
“Um, maybe? I think so?”
His smile is soft as he looks at me.
“It’s okay if you want to think about it. We don’t have to make final decisions right now. I just want us to be open with each other,” he says.
I nod, feeling more settled by what he says.
“What about oral? Did Logan ever go down on you?”
