His head cocks to the side. “Do you find it annoying having to wait for something you already know you’re gonna get?”
“This isn’t the time, Carey.”
He shuffles closer. “Isn’t it?”
“I know what you’re doing.”
“And what’s that?”
“You’ve already broken me… I’m already yours.”
I watch him bite the tip of his tongue as he nods with the most smug grin I’ve ever seen plastered on his face. “You know what I like to hear.”
“I like seeing you happy.”
“Then shut up and accept my gift.”
Just like the first time he spoke down to me, I feel my body flush with endorphins.
I swallow, and nod.
He smirks, “Good boy,” and I almost pass out.
Carey takes a small step back and hands me a gaudy Christmas bag, the kind you get at the dollar store. “I can see why you didn’t put this under the tree.”
He reaches for it. “I can take it back.”
I snatch it away. “Don’t be a shit.”
“Why would I stop when you love it so much?” My gaze drops to his stomach. He’s doing that thing he does where he drags his hand over it, his fingers absentmindedly drawing circles around his navel. “I’m not your present.”
“But what if you’re all that I want?”
“Just look in the damn bag, old man.”
My hand reaches inside but my eyes are still distracted by the shadows on his skin, then I feel something soft and plush. Pulling the handles apart I see a pair of slippers. But not just any slippers, the light blue ones from my Halmae. The ones she hand embroidered. The ones I threw away.
I run my fingers along the small golden-thread letters arching over the top of each:
?? ?? ?? ???? ??? ? ??? ?? ????
My life is too precious to live at a glance in the lives of others.
“W-where did you?”
“I took them out of the dumpster the day you threw them out.”
I drop them back into the bag. “Why would you do that?”
“Are you mad?”
“No I’m just…” I turn away from him, and he follows.
“Just what?”
“I don’t know.” It’s not a total lie. It’s just that apart from when my Halmae gave me the slippers in the first place, I’m not sure I’ve ever been so truly seen. There’s no way Carey knows what the writing says, but even back then he saw straight through my bullshit and right to how important they were to me.
He strokes my back. “They were a bitch to get clean.”
